I tried to make a belt out of watches, but it was a waste of time.
A scarecrow said this job isn't for everyone.
But hay! It's in my jeans!
What starts with a P and ends in S? (hint: men have it and women want it). Pockets.
The other day, I walked up to someone who looked lost and he had all scraggy clothes on. I said, "Are you an orphan?"
He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"
I said, "Your parents, buddy."
Q: What is it called when a hoe is getting ready for her party but doesn't know what to wear but is thinking about it? A: A thotprosses
What do tigers wear in the winter?
A striped sweater.
What's the difference between an emo and my clothes?
My clothes don't hang themselves.
Why do nuns not wear bras?
God supports everything.
Why do Scottish men wear kilts?
Sheep can hear unzipping trousers from a distance of 100 yards.
A cardboard belt is a waste of paper.
How are wet clothes and a depressed person alike? One gets hung up to dry, the other gets hung up to die.
Q: What do Mexicans love to wear in the air force?
A: Air Force Juans.
I got a reversible jacket for Christmas, I can't wait to see how it turns out.
People at my school have started to wear Logan Paul merch. I try to give them a high five, but they always leave me hanging.
What does a depressed person and a jacket have in common?
They’re both hanging in the closet.
Why are emos useful in stores? A: Their barcodes give them discounts.
Little Johnny runs up to his mother and says, "Mommy, mommy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, daddy came in with the lady next door and they started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off daddy's clothes and daddy took off the clothes from the lady next door, and they both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of daddy and started...". The mother cuts him off and says "Just stop right there. You wait until your daddy comes home so you can tell him everything you just told me." Couple hours later the father arrives and walks through the door to find his wife and child with bags packed. She walks up to him and slaps across the face shouting "I'm leaving you... Go ahead Johnny, tell him what you told me earlier." Johnny steps forward to tell his daddy. "Daddy, the other day I was playing with my ball upstairs and my ball got away and into your closet, and when I went to get it, you came in with the lady next door and you both started hugging and kissing and the lady next door took off your clothes and you took off the clothes from the lady next door, and you both got into your bed, and the lady next door got on top of you and started doing the same thing mom did with uncle Joe last summer."
What did the policeman say to his belly button?
You're under a vest.
What do you call a mouse with sneakers?
Squeakers!
What’s the difference between a priest and target?
Nothing, they both have children’s pants half off.
