What do you call it when Batman skips church?
Christian Bale.
I was raised a Catholic, and my priest told me when I was 12, "God is watching you when you masturbate."
I said, "Is God a pedophile too, Father?"
How do you get a nun pregnant? -- Dress her up as an alter boy.
Welcome to the Church of the Holy Cabbage.
Lettuce pray.
What's the most fun a monk can have?
Nun.
How do you make holy water?
You boil the hell out of it.
