Robin asks Batman what he is getting his parents for Christmas. Batman gets mad, slaps Robin, and runs off crying.
Now you know why Batman Beyond was born when Bruce died. cause of death: suicide
Where’s the best place to put a Christmas tree?
In between Christmas two and Christmas four. 😉😂😂
Why did Billy not like the soccer ball he got for Christmas?
He has no legs...
What's the only thing Mexicans can unwrap on Christmas? Tamales.
When Santa asks you what you want for Christmas, then says "ho ho ho," say, "Yes, please."
What is worse to have - a dead baby or a dead Santa Claus?
Santa. You need extra freezers for reindeer.
What did the blind man say on Christmas?
"I can feel your presents!"
A sex addict man meets a rich man around Christmas.
The sex addict asks the rich man, "What are you getting your wife this Christmas?" The rich man replies, "Diamond earrings and a Mercedes." The sex addict asks, "Why are you getting her two gifts?" The rich man says, "Well, if she doesn't like the earrings then she can drive to the store and exchange them."
The sex addict nods. Then the rich man asks him, "So what are you getting your wife this year?" The sex addict thinks about it for a second and replies, "A gold necklace and a dildo."
The rich man asks, "Why those two things?" The sex addict astutely responds, "This way, if she doesn't like the jewelry she can go f... herself."
Why was Stephen Hawking disappointed when he got his Christmas present? It was singing lessons.
Well, tell her that Halloween is the best holiday because you can hide Easter eggs under the Christmas tree while eating a big Thanksgiving turkey.
Kids are cute, not even joking. Wanking is easy around them.
On Christmas, Mexicans wake up in the morning, then take a nap.
Joking, I know they work hard. They run all the way to the border to decorate the barbed wire.
Your mama so ugly, when Santa Claus came to her house and saw her, he said, "HO HO HOLY SHIT THAT'S ONE UGLY BITCH!"
What did the girl get for Christmas?
Cancer.
Yo mama so fat, when Santa Claus went down the chimney, he said, "Ho, ho, hooooly sh*t!"
Santa Claus walks up to three little girls and says, "Ho, ho, ho!"
Santa was asked to describe Mrs. Claus in three words. His response was, "Ho ho ho."
Did you know what my grandpa wanted for Christmas? A new ass because his one has a crack on it.
What does the child with no hands get for Christmas? Unknown. He hasn't opened it yet.
What does a homeless man in New York get for Christmas? Hypothermia.
Why did little sally fall off the swings?
Because she had no arms.
What did sally get for Christmas?
Gloves! Only joking...she still hasn’t opened the box.
