Children jokes

What is the name of a show for kids?

Barney.

A man sacrificed children who played Roblox, so when someone knocked on the door, they said, "An administrator has banned you from heaven!"

Why can't orphans have a funeral? Because their parents won't be there.

What do orphans and sperm donor kids have in common? They don't have dads.

Why can't Michael Jackson come within 500 meters of a school?

Because he's dead. 😁

What do birds and children have in common?

If you shoot them, they die.

Name one person who would take an orphan?

Michael Jackson, so they can play all night.

Why did they make bus stops? So the bus driver would know where to pick the orphan up.

What do you call an orphanage that's not an orphanage?

A homeless shelter.

I was walking home when I saw children crossing the street on their own. I went towards him and tapped his shoulder and said, "Hey, little kid, you are not supposed to be walking on your own." The kid turns out to be a dwarf.

I have no dad, no milk, and no mom, so that means no tits, like if you can relate.

Are you a school bus? Because I want to fill you with kids.

What do Helen Keller and orphans have in common?

Neither of them can see or hear their parents.

Why do orphans always go to white vans when someone asks?

Because they want to feel wanted.

There's one shop orphans can't go to, but what is it?

Home Depot.

What do blind kids and orphans have in common?

Both can't see their parents.

Why do orphans hate hide and seek?

Their parents went to play hide and seek years ago.

Q: What did the little girl say to her leper daddy?

A: "Oops, I got your nose!"

How do Taliban parents feed their babies?

"Here comes the plane... weeee, BOOM! 💥"

What did the orphan say to its parents?

"Hey, Mom and Dad—oh wait, you're not my parents. I don't have none. Will you adopt me, please?"

They people: "No."