Children jokes

What's an orphan's least favorite game?

Baseball because they can't find home plate.

Everyone likes orphans but their parents.

My mom tells me and my sister to stop fighting. "Mom! You and Dad need to stop!"

Why don't orphans go to the shops? Because when their mum leaves, she's never coming back.

A little girl was sitting with some other kids. She thought to herself, "I want to have kids when I'm older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!" 🤣😂

Why can't orphans go to the hospital? Because it is a family hospital. Sorry for the long break in between my jokes. I just had some family stuff, but I am back.

So yesterday, I was at an orphanage, harassing children by twerking at them.

They burst into tears.

I was worried that they would call their mom, well... um... I got away.

The most powerful thing in the world is babies. This is because they cry and get what every they want.

What show do orphans hate?

Family Guy.

What’s the difference between orphans and blind children?

None. Neither can see their parents.

I was kicked out of an orphanage kitchen because I yelled, "Hurry up, some of us have homes to get back to."

Why don't Chinese children believe in Santa?

Because they're the ones making the toys.

Why doesn’t Joe Biden visit children with cancer in hospitals?

Because he can’t sniff their hair.

Why can't orphans do homework? They don't have a home.

Why do orphans want to become criminals? To know what it feels like to be wanted.

So little Susie came home and said, "Mom, little Johnny showed me his pecker."

And her mom said, "WHAT?!"

And little Susie was like, "Yeah, it reminded me of a peanut." Her mom said, "Oh, because it was so small?"

Susie said, "No, because it tasted salty."

What do you call a large lamp that does illicit things to young children?

A Jacko Lantern!

What is an orphan's dad's job?

A magician because he makes himself disappear.

What do you call an orphan if every other orphan gets picked?

Someone: Ugly?

Me: No, trick question, they are still an orphan.

If you have anger problems, hit an orphan, because who are they going to tell? Not their parents.