Children jokes
What do you call an orphan family tree?
A tree stump.
Why can't orphans go to sleepovers?
Their parents never say yes.
Farrah Fawcett, upon arriving at the pearly gates, God asked her, for having led such an honest life, to grant her one wish. Farrah simply requested that the children of the world would be safe.
Five hours later, Michael Jackson died.
One morning a dad was sitting and watching TV. His daughter comes in and says, "Dad! Why is my name Rose?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were born a rose petal fell on your head." "Cool," Rose said.
The second daughter walked in and said, "Dad! Why is my name Daisy?" He replied, "Oh! It's because when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Awesome," Daisy said.
The third daughter came in and said, "DuUuBuDuRDeEDeRdUuUuU!!!" "SHUT UP CINDER BLOCK!!!"
Is it just me, or do you kids have imaginations?
Why can you bully orphans?
What are they gonna do, tell their parents? Oh wait, they got no parents.
Nutted in my shoes, now my kids are taking a walk.
If Jeffy goes to an orphanage, he will die. How is he supposed to move?
What does a pedophile and a light switch have in common?
They both get turned on by children.
How old are 9/11 victims?
"There, toddlers, here come the airplane!"
What do you call a group of depressed kids?
Suicide squad.
Why did little Timmy dip the cookie in water?
"Because his dad never brought the milk."
My bro’s parents died, but he didn’t know why.
Turns out they died because he was a failure, and he would be going to an orphanage in 4 days.
My daughter is the most adorable little girl in the world. She's got my sister's eyes.
Man, don't you hate it when you hit a speed bump by an orphanage but then realize there's no speed bumps here...
Q: What's a pedophile's favorite place to eat?
A: Schools because there is a wide variety of choices.
Why do orphans become criminals when they grow up? Because they want to be wanted.
Children in the dark make mistakes.
Mistakes in the dark make children.
Ice cream truck drivers are the most sus people on earth. They’re adults who play children’s music and give ice cream to kids who approach their van.
What's the difference between an Afghan kindergarten and a military target?
The drone guy didn't know either.