Stranger: Do you want a lollipop?
Kid: No, I hate lollipops, so yeah, and you are not my daddy.
I gave a blind kid a gun and told him it was a hairdryer.
I was listening to my children praying, and my youngest that can speak said to me: "Mama, why is Gramma dead?"
I smiled and told her, "Well, less than 10 years ago when I was 5, your age, my Momma took me into the basement with some hot rando during a party. And 9 months later Shinana was born. One Pedo after another and your 4 siblings were born. The Pedo I met last night told me, 'If your mother's the one making you do this, do what you do best.' I listened and the next day she didn't leave her bed breathing. When the Pedo found out he left me and your soon to be brother."
She replies with, "Make his child support expensive!" Now he has to pay me 2,000 U.S. dollars every month, like the other ones that ran away.
Little Johnny died.
My blind son got hit by a car when he was riding his new bike. He should have been paying attention.
I molested a child today, and it felt quite lovely on my penis! 👍
Knock knock, Whos there? child, Child who? Child Millissa!
Why was the kid sad?
He was adopted.
An orphan goes up to someone. The guy says, "Where are your parents?"
The orphan says, "Why do you think I'm wearing ripped pyjamas?"
Jorden Calerendiá.
I bet you are a child molester who got out of jail and is now sexually harassing kids such as Addison! Will fuck off and get a life, by the way your roasts are not fucking funny they are bullshit like your face and your hairline.
Why don’t orphans play baseball? Cause they don’t know where home is!
Why did the priest go to the clothing sale at Walmart?
He heard that little boy's pants were half off.
Why does Little Johnny hate hot dogs?
It reminds him of last night.
How is sports like regular life for orphans?
They don't get picked for either.
A child with cancer says, "Mother, what will I be when I grow up?"
Then the mother says, "Shut up, dick, you have cancer!" Hehehe.
Children are so ungrateful nowadays. I got my daughter a bike, but now she’s crying on the floor saying, “I don’t have legs!”
My brother Taf likes to pee the bed.
When the card declines on child insurance.
A child's parents once lived in Chicago.
I wonder why he's in an orphanage now.
Your dad went on America's Got Talent for "smoothest way to leave their child."
