Child jokes
Heh, stupid orphan.
One day this kid says to his dad, "Dad, they bully me at school."
His dad asks why, and the kid says, "They bully me because I got no hands."
Then his dad says, "Who would do such a thing like that? I want to know who they are. Point at them!"
You're walking one day and a little kid, about 5-6 years old, comes up to you asking, "What's a condom?" You have to give that child the wrong answer, what would you tell them? Comment on what you would tell them.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't run home.
What's an orphan's favorite movie?
"Home Alone."
What did the blonde say when someone says, "Your baby is so cute?"
"For the last time, I don't want to sign up my child for Tindergarten just yet!"
Why can’t orphans play baseball? Because they can’t find home.
David’s parents have three sons: Snap, Crackle, and what’s the name of the third son?
Answer: David.
What do orphans not see on a controller?
The home button.
What do you do when an orphan is taking a photo?
Yell "FAMILY PICTURES!"
What's the same about boxes and children?
They're both found in basements.
What is an orphan's favorite toy? A mom and dad action figure.
What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple actually gets picked.
"Stupid ass baby."
Why can’t orphans go on field trips? Because they need parent permission.
What does the Catholic Church and Worstjokesever.com have in common?
They're both full of child groomers.
Guess why orphans can't play baseball? Because they don't know what home is.
Why can't orphans play rounders?
Because they don't know where home is.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is...
I went to jail because I gave the orphan kid a calendar with 363 days.
(I deleted Mother's Day and Father's Day.)