Chicken jokes
Little Johnny comes down for breakfast because he lives on a farm, and his mother asks if he has done his chores or not.
"Not yet," says little Johnny, so he goes to feed the chickens, cows, and pigs. He ends up kicking the chickens, cows, and pigs and goes inside and asks why he got a dry bowl of cereal. His mother responds with, "I saw you kick the chickens, so no eggs for a week. I also saw you kick the pigs, so no bacon for a week either. I also saw you kick the cows, so no milk for a week either."
Little Johnny's father comes downstairs and kicks the cats. Little Johnny looks at his mother and says, "You want to tell him, or should I?"
What's the difference between a chicken and a dog?
I don't know... I'm from China.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
One hot day a cow wanted some shade.
He found a tree and started resting under it, but there was a chicken bothering him. The cow exclaimed, "Moooove!" The chicken didn't move. Again, "Moooove!" and still the chicken wouldn't move. The cow yelled, "MOOOOOVE!" The chicken turned around and said, "FUCKOFF."
Why does the egg crack? Cos it's sad.
Memes
Omg my 34 week old chicken literally climbed onto my scooter Saturday. Pure gold 👌😂
There were 32 cows. Twenty-eight chickens. How many were there?
There were 32 cows. Twenty ate chickens. How many were there?
Max Heart and his gay cousin Nickals Amoto say I back out of a fight. When he said let's fight, then last minute he said he doesn't want to, then says I chickened out. I [was] ready to fight, but his gut [was] swollen [and] his arms [were]. He actually looks like Humpty Dumpty, but [I] just wanted to say he backed out + Max and Nickals are both gay with each other.
Me and my cousin went to a restaurant yesterday.
I ordered my chicken fried, he ordered his chicken alive.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get the Chinese Daily!
Get it? I don't either--I get the New York Times!
Person: Guess what?
Other person: What?
Person: Chicken butt!
Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit the idiot.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
The chicken who?
*Silence*
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Answer:
The man said, "He's going to rape the people on the side of the road."
Guess what?
What?
Chicken butt!
Chicken
Why did the chicken go to the restaurant?
To eat chicken!
Why did the farmer's wife chase the chickens out of the yard?
'Cause they were using fowl language!
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the British bastard and get the egg roll.
The other day this duck came by the gas station. He asked the cashier, "Do you have any duck food here?"
The cashier said, "Hell naw, I got no damn duck food. This the gas station, not no damn swamp, and I ain't ya mama."
Then the duck asked him two more times, and then the cashier said, "For the last time, no, I don't have any duck food here for you, ok? If you ask me again, I will put you in the oven and deep-fry you like Kentucky Fried Chicken."
Went to my local Indian restaurant and asked the waiter for a chicken tarka Masala.
The waiter said, "What's that?"
I said, "It's the same as a tikka, just a little otter."
What do you get when you kill a brown chicken and brown cow?
Dead chicken and dead cow.