A guy walks into a restaurant and orders Turtle soup . The waiter hollers “One Turtle Soup”. A moment later the guy calls the waiter over and says, I’ve changed my mind , I would like Pea Soup The waiter hollers “ Hold The Turtle and Make It Pea “
Q: What did the stop light say to the other stop light
A: Stop looking, I’m changing
ik ive changed my name from tj to selfish king but know its gunna be selfishking#781
i went for a job interview today and the manager said, "We're looking for someone who is responsible."
"Well, I'm your man." I replied, "In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."
the way u talk is so slow that the put u in the movie fast and furious and changed the title to slow and serious!!!😂😂😭
I know you don't like me, and that implies you need better taste.
I'm no an astronomer, but I'm pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun... not you.
I'd give you a nasty look, but it seems like you've already got one.
Your birth certificate should be rewritten as a letter of apology
You haven't changed since the last time I saw you. You really should.
What do hockey players and Surrey girls have common? They both only change their pads after every third period!
Guys can we change pride month to another month please my birthday is in june and im mot gay and my friends keep making fun of me i think we should change it to march because my brothers birthday is in march and thatd be funny
Why did the golfer change his pants because he got hole in one
(no joke) paul walker is the best legend to go down in history, change my mind
how many africans does it take to change a light
a water bottle
When I see your face there's one thing I want to change The direction I'm looking
Last night I was watching a Scotland Christmas movie... And the part when Mary tells Joseph that she is pregnant, Joseph was surprised and he exclaimed, "Jesus Christ!!!". I immediately stopped watching changed the channel
2019, where you can change your gender at a snap of a finger
Random person: Imma smack you so hard your skin pigment changes!
Me: Who the hell do you think you are? Michael Jackson’s dad?
kid- ur so fat other kid- at least fat can be change but yo ugly face cant be
How many degrees does it take to change ice into boiling water? 199, because, the difference between -100 and +100 is 199 (excluding the zero, because it's not real and it doesn't exist because it's not real). Get? https://youtu.be/XZQOjp0i35A?t=333
These people who are offended by rape jokes don’t even understand humour, they think of humour as like a happy thing because humour makes us laugh and laughter makes us happy, but most of the jokes that we laugh at are filled with pain and suffering, if I take a joke like , how many police officers does it take to change a light bulb, none they just beat the room for being black, now that joke isn’t make light of the fact that people have marched in the civil rights movement and people have been racial discriminated against, it’s not making light of those, what it’s doing is it’s taking that pain and suffering and making you transcend it for a moment, and showing the absurdity of the human mind and that is important, humour at its best takes the bad thing in this world that are painful and hard to deal with and makes it something funny
And before you go in the comments and say i agree with rape, I don’t, I hope everybody who rapes someone to have there dick cut of, my little sister got fucking raped when she was six, and the guy is lucky he got caught by the police and not me cause if I caught I would have fucking killed him, so I don’t agree with rape, but I still think rape jokes should still not be taken so seriously!
What do you call it when you see Chinese people in a gang? - The Ching Chang Gang
you are so poor when I pass you ask for spair change and I was poor to
Yo mama so ugly that when she turned on the tv it changed channels by it self