Change

Change Jokes

Slang

Somebody told me that black slang is just white slang in reverse. For example:

White person: Dad, you're home!

Black person: Dad?

White person: You can keep the change.

Black person: Empty the register.

Woman

How many women does it take to change a light bulb?

None, because they're so DARN STUPID!!!!

President

I used to think all Americans were racist.

Now I've changed my mind. They DID elect an orange president.

Duck

I "onerie," or however you spell it, I like to replace all romance or similar memes with duck memes. Just comment duck memes there and change Valentine's Day to Duck Day. Also, for the joke:

Why did the duck walk up to the lemonade stand?

Because he wanted grapes.

Feminist

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Trick question, feminists don't change anything.

Police Officer

How many police officers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two: one to change the lightbulb, and the other to open fire while the room is dark.

Emo kid

How many emo kids does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, they just like hanging in the dark.

Lightbulb

How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?

The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.

Name

Q. What's the best part of living in Alabama?

A. Not having to change your last name when you get married.

Politician

Politicians and diapers have one thing in common.

They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.

Bank

I was at my bank today waiting in a short line. There was just one lady in front of me, an Asian lady, who was trying to exchange yen for dollars. It was obvious she was a little irritated. She asked the teller, "Why it change? Yesterday, I get two hunat dolla of yen. Today I only get hunat eighty? Why it change?" The teller shrugged his shoulders and said, "Fluctuations." The Asian lady says, "Fluc you white people too!"

Friend

My best friend is transgender; she transitioned from a man into a woman. I think it's courageous of her to take a pay cut like that.