Celebrity jokes
"Prince, I'm ready to chat when you are. I'm in bed, so yeah, let's chat! Love you!"
What's Michael Jackson's favorite drug? Crack.
What do you call vampire Matt Damon?
Bat Damon!
Your hairline pushed back lookin' like you got slapped up by Will Smith.
First of all, if a woman sues Bill Cosby for drugging and rape 50 years ago, and she could still remember it, it couldn't have been all bad.
Mia: I'm pregnant again, Paul. I can't wait for you to come home.
Paul: I got a tree to hit on the way.
Why isn't Hilary Duff interested in education?
A. She said that she was not interested in learning about anything that was so yesterday.
I was sweating like Michael Jackson in a Chuck E. Cheese.
What did God say when he made Jake Paul?
"Oops, I made a mistake."
Your hairline is so bad that KSI's hairline actually looks normal.
What is found under Michael Jackson's pillow?
Billie's jeans.
Your hairline goes so far back even Dwayne Johnson refused to sit there.
How do you beat Lady Gaga at Texas hold’em?
Poker face.
Michael J. Fox came up to me the other day and introduced himself to me. He said, "Hey, what’s shaking?"
I said, "You."
Why did Michael Jackson like having little boys round him? He was studying for the priesthood.
A lot of people ask why I only make jokes about Paul Walker and no one else.
Because they didn’t have as big of an impact as him.
The teacher asked a young boy in primary school, "Can you tell me the alphabet?"
To which the boy replies, "No."
The teacher then sets his homework to learn the alphabet.
At home, the boy goes up to his mum, who is on the phone, and asks, "Can you tell me the alphabet?"
"Shut up," she replied.
The boy goes to his dad, who just won the footie match, and asks, "Can you teach me the alphabet?"
But the dad is too busy celebrating and shouting, "Hell yeah! Hell yeah! Yeaaahh!"
The boy goes to his big brother and asks him to teach him the alphabet.
But his brother is singing, "I'm Michael Jackson, I'm Michael Jackson!"
The boy goes to his sister and asks her for the alphabet.
But his sister is singing, "In my big red car, in my big red car!"
The next day the teacher asks him the alphabet.
The boy replies, "Shut up."
"Alright, I'm sending you to the principal's office right now."
The boy replies, "Hell yeah! Hell yeah! Yeaaahh!"
In the office, the principal says, "Who do you think you are?"
The boy replies, "I'm Michael Jackson, I'm Michael Jackson!"
The principal now says, "How do you think you'll get away with this?"
The boy then replies, "In my big red car, in my big red car!"
What do you call a bank robbery with MrBeast?
A donation team.
He sang a love song to a rat, yet stans are befuddled on why people keep calling their idol "Wacko Jacko".
Why do kids like Michael Jackson so much?
Because he's made out of plastic, and that's what toys are made out of! 😂