Celebrity jokes
Your hairline so far back.
Even LeBron James had a good laugh!
Miksi Michael lähti limusiinistä ulos?
Hän näki alastoman pojan.
Your hairline goes so far back even Dwayne Johnson refused to sit there.
Why can't Kobe go shopping?
He's dead.
What do Marshall Tucker Band and Kobe Bryant have in common?
Their last big hit was "Fire on the Mountain."
Memes
Why did Michael Jackson become white? He wanted to be like a ghost, and I have any feeheet.
I never touched kids, just women, but since I was famous, they were fine with it.
My Wi-Fi must be Kobe, because it crashed hard.
Cardi B has very long nails.
Yo mama's so dumb, she thought Bruno Mars was a planet!
Have you seen Dolly Parton's new shoes? Neither has she!
His new music video has been leaked. It’s called “Living in a Tree.”
What do you call vampire Matt Damon?
Bat Damon!
What does Vin Diesel eat for dinner?
Survival Guilt.
What is it called when 21 Savage and 6ix9ine fight: Alien vs. Predator?
Chuck Norris is the only man that ever had sex with my wife and survived. Oh, how did I survive?
Fortunately, being her husband, I was the one person she wasn't fucking.
Why does Joe only have 264 days in his calendar?
Because he can't celebrate Father's Day.
Celebrating Mother's Day is confusing, says my cousin.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
I suck.
I suck who?
Michael Jackson.
Donald Trump travels back in time to talk to his 10-year-old self.
When he sees himself, he says, "Do you see me? I am you, but almost 70 years older."
His 10-year-old self asks him, "Am I going to be famous?"
Trump replies, "Oh yeah, I became president of the United States. Not once. Twice!"
10-year-old Donald was shocked. But he became even more shocked when he heard the next sentence from his current self: "And now take off your pants!"