Celebrity jokes
I heard that Jimmy Savile never wanted to be famous... All he ever wanted was to settle down, and have kids.
I’d make a joke to Fetty Wap on this, but there’s only a 50/50 chance he’ll SEE this.
Why does Michael Jackson like football, baseball, and tennis? Because of the "balls".
I would make a Paul Walker joke, but it would crash and burn.
What's the difference between Michael Jackson and acne? Acne doesn't come on a 5-year-old's face.
What do you call a black couple who's on welfare and food stamps?
Lay-Z and Freeyonce.
Why did the Secret Service detain Johnny Depp at the White House?
Because he was about to kick the cabinet.
Why do bunnies like Bruno Mars? Because he got 24 carrots.
I work as an IT technician. The other day, I had to fix Cristiano Ronaldo’s laptop. He pointed to a message on the screen saying, “Do you consent to cookies?” He said that he doesn’t eat cookies and doesn’t know what consent means, so that’s why he called me.
A lot of people claim that white privilege does not exist. Well, how the hell do you explain Michael Jackson not being charged for raping children, despite ample evidence?
Q: What's stronger than family?
A: Whatever tree Paul Walker hit.
Did you know Paul Walker was a method actor? He took his role very seriously as a human torch.
How did they figure out what kind of shampoo Paul Walker used? They found his “head and shoulders” in the dash.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a fly? It's the sound they make when they hit the windshield.
Why does Michael Jackson like Chef Boyardee? He likes the little balls.
Jake Adkins watches James Charles.
How do you find Will Smith in the snow? Follow the fresh prints.
Prince will be coming back in 10 mins here is a joke.
Gwen: Prince sorry but I'm wanting someone else instead. You've just been a complete jackass toward me, sorry good night.
Prince: Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gwen: Good night!
Prince: Why?
Gwen: Because...now good night!
Prince: We can work some things out?
Gwen: Nope...NOW GOOD NIGHT!!!!!!!!
To be continued
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot Wheels.
What did Jay Z say when he got pulled over?
"I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one!"