This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas, I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
What do I and a brand new chandelier have in common? One of these days, we’re both are gonna be hanging from the ceiling
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
what did the floor say to the ceiling. i look up to you.
I like my kids like I like my lamps.
Hung from the ceiling.
God, I miss Stephen Hawking. He was brainier than Kurt Cobain's ceiling.
a friend texts to another "hey", they reply, "What's up?". The first friend then replies with a simple answer, "the sky!", but the other friend intervenes and says, "no it's the ceiling!". To then the first friend finishes the greeting with, "unless you're homeless or six feet under."
how do you get a party started in Africa
you put a slice of bread on the ceiling and everyone will be jumping
how do you start an Ethiopian rave? stick toast to the ceiling.
I walked into a store and I pointed a stick to the roof and i said"this is a stick up"
Today I’m attaching a light to the ceiling, but I’m afraid I’ll probably screw it up.
What’s Whitney Houston’s favourite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
Read more: 100 of the funniest ever jokes and best one-liners
What does a baby computer call his father? Data!
What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!
Why did the golfer change his pants? Because he got a hole in one!
Does anyone need an ark? I Noah guy!
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money. He just stands there applauding and saying “Ooh, I love how smooth it is.”
What has one head, one foot and four legs? A: A Bed
Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: Never mind, it's over your head!
Q: How many letters are in the alphabet A.11 A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T
I don't see why women are complaining about the glass ceiling, I mean if they reach high enough they can clean it...
My favorite book is brown spots on the ceiling By Ho Fung Poo
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
how do you organize a Rave party in Ethiopia? just put some bread on the ceiling
Once I went to a museum and over heard someone speaking to an employee for information.
“These are lying clocks, they tell how many lies a person tells.”
“oh cool”
“this is mother Teresa’s clock, the clock hasn’t moved because she never lied.”
“Makes sense”
“This is Abraham Lincoln’s clock. The hands only moved twice indicating he only lied twice.”
“Where’s Trump’s clock”
“Oh, we’re using it as a ceiling fan.”
And then I burst out laughing 'cause it’s so true.
How do you start a rave in Etiopia? You put food ceiling and they start jumping.
