A kid told me to go get a dad, so I punched the kid. He went to tell his parents. Oh wait, he can't, 'cause he's an orphan, and orphans have no parents.
Cause Jokes
Never give up, 'cause never gonna give you up.
Never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you, never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye, never gonna desert you.
Why can’t Michael Jackson get within 500 meters of a school?
Cause he’s dead.
Why can't orphans ride a bike?
'Cause their parents won't follow them.
Roses are red, violets are blue, You'll suck my dick 'cause I'm stronger than you.
Teacher: Okay class, look at the person to the right of you and describe them with one word.
Me: *looks to the right of me and sees the pick-me girl* "Penny."
Teacher: *shocked* How is she a penny?
Me: 'Cause she's two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants. Not to mention worth practically nothing.
Your forehead is so big you have to wear a hoodie for the Rock to see your ego because your forehead is so big.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? "Why?" 'Cause she had no arms.
Why did Sally drop a broom? "Why?" 'Cause she had no arms.
Why did Sally go swimming? She didn't like not having arms.
Knock knock. "Who's there?" Not Sally, she hasn't come back yet.
Why is England bad at chess?
'Cause they lost their queen.
Are you George Floyd?
'Cause baby, you take my breath away... OOF!
"I think my draco might be gay. Why? 'Cause he blow niggas."
Nardo Wick
I know your name is baller cause I'm gonna put my baller into yo MOTHER HOLLER!
If you drop an apple and an emo girl, who falls first?
The apple, because the emo girl hung herself.
Are you a hotdog stand? 'Cause you make my hotdog stand ;)
How much does a chimney cost?
It's free cause it's on the house.
I turned off all the beeping machines in the hospital. I love the peace and quiet, but I don't know why everyone is sleeping cause it's only 8 am.
Your hairline is what caused the Great Depression.
Why can't two Chinese people have a white baby? Because two "wongs" don't make a "white."
What's the most optimistic blood type? B+.
What disease causes wrinkled clothes? An iron deficiency.
A guy gets home from work to see his girlfriend packing, and he asks her why she is packing. The girl says, "Because I found out you're a pedophile." The guy goes, "A pedophile?" And she says, "Yes." The guy goes, "That's a big word for a 12-year-old."