Cat jokes
Why did the cats go in the litterbox?? To take a poop!
The cat said hi.
What did the cat say when he fell off the table?
MEOM!
▄【デc̷a̷t̷══━一.
Spread the cat gun.
You're so ugly Bob the Builder cat can fix you.
Can I tell you a cat joke?
Yes, 'cause it's purr-fect.
Q: How did we learn cats don't land on their feet?
A: We asked Mufasa from the Lion King.
My cat's breath smells like cat food.
You got a black cat.
He was bad luck.
Everyone left you and you committed suicide.
What a CATastrophe!
What is Puss In Boots' favorite boot brand?
CAT!
How do you make a cat sound like a dog?
You set it on fire; then it goes, "WOOF!"
A woman was sitting alone at a bar, and a man approached her. He asked her why she looked so sad. She responded that her boyfriend had just broken up with her because she was too kinky.
The man expressed his amazement when he admitted that his girlfriend had dumped him because of his fetishes. After a few drinks, they decided to go back to her place.
When they arrived, she told him to make himself comfortable while she freshened up. The man complied. After a long time, she burst open her bedroom door and said, "I hope you're ready!"
She stood in the doorway wearing a latex body suit and a gas mask. She had a whip in one hand, a flogger in the other hand, and a 12-inch strap-on dangling between her thighs.
The dude looked at her and said, "Thanks, but I'm good for the night!"
She said, "I thought you said that you were kinky."
The dude replied, "While you were in there, I f-cked your cat, pissed in your plants, and came on your curtains. It's been fun!"
I killed my cat.
The fucking cat!
Simplest way to tell if dogs are better than cats: My dog is named Curiosity, and your cat is dead.
This is rifle. ▄【デc̷a̷t̷══━一 He needs help being spread across this website. Copy this message and paste it on any joke upon this website. Spread and save rifle.
When you tell an Asian kid it’s raining cats and dogs and he’s like, “Just open your mouth and close your eyes!”
What did Schrödinger say to Shakespeare?
"To be and not to be."
What did a cat say to the dog?
"I will kill and eat you hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehhehehehehehehehehehehheehehhehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehheeehehehehehehehe"
I was going to tell you a joke about a big cat, but I would be lion.