Cant jokes

Lucifer's so broke he can't even afford air conditioning units.

Kids make a lot of plans for people who can't drive anywhere.

10/7 is probably a spinoff of 9/11.

You can't convince me otherwise.

Why can’t Helen Keller jump out of an airplane?

It scares the shit out of her dog.

Why can't there be a gay disabled person?

Because a fruit can't be the same as a vegetable.

What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow?

You can't milk a cow for over 10 years.

God creates dog.

God: "You are man's best friend."

Dog: "That's pretty sexist."

God: "No, man as in- You know what, FUCK IT! You can't speak!"

Dog: "....."

God: "And chocolate kills you!"

Dog: "🐶"

The best part about Asian jokes is that the only people that can be offended can't see the jokes.

I can't not believe you stupid fucks. This isn't funny. Just like a bunch of cunts not to believe there is nothing can't do.

BTW what do you call a manly woman's cunt? Nothing. Who gives a fuck?

They're making a new Alien movie.

There are so many aliens you can't keep track.

Why can you bully an orphan?

Because they can’t tell their parents.

Why can't you play Uno with a Mexican? Because they'll steal all the green cards.

Why can't Stephen Hawking win any arguments?

Because he can't stand up for himself.

Why can't orphans play baseball?

Because they have no home to run to.

What do you get when you cross a Chinese and an Indian man?

A car thief who can't drive.

Your wife dumped you because you are so poor and you are so ugly. You also live under a rock and have no money. You got dumped so hard you can't remember you got dumped.

Why can't orphans be gay?

Because they can't call anyone their dad.

You're so ugly, even a Snapchat filter can't fix it.

What's a bonus of being an orphan?

You can't get homework.

Me going to jail after telling the orphan he can't learn about ancient Egypt because he don't know what a mummy is.