Cancer jokes
What do you call a guy named Ben?
Answer: Ben
What does milk and a kid with cancer have in common?
An expiration date.
What did the kid with leukemia watch last night? Finding Chemo.
What do you call a mammal that has no hair?
Cancer.
They say Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer, too bad he doesn't cry.
So, we are in class right, and the teacher has a metal leg. Every year she gets the question of, "Do metal detectors beep every time you walk by them?" She heard this question to the point where she just says yes without hesitation.
Once she had said yes, two kids in the back started laughing.
Teacher: Ok alright, take it a little bit more seriously would you?
Kid: Oh, we're not laughing at that.
Kid_2: We're laughing at cancer.
Why is the disease lung cancer never hungry? Because it's eating your lungs.
What did the deaf, dumb, and blind kid get for Christmas?
Answer: cancer.
Kollaps
Derrick and Clive. They have a song about a Dad with cancer and other extremely offensive subjects in a routine called "The Non-Stop Dancer." It is very funny, but it is made even funnier by Dudley Moore's drunken and stoned laughter through the song.
One of the best routines ever. Look it up on YouTube. They recorded them in the studio, but they are ad-libbing and extremely drunk.
Cancer
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Why can’t Sally get a hair cut? She has cancer.
The cancer patient asked the doctor how many more months he had to live. The doctor replied, "Tu-more."
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?"
The horse replies, "My wife just died of cancer, and my alcohol addiction is tearing my family apart."
The bartender responds, saying "Oh" sympathetically. "Sucks to be you!" the bartender yells, throwing a bottle of wine at the horse.
A woman visits the doctor as she has some abdominal pains and suspects she may be pregnant.
After her examination, the doctor comes out to see her: “Well, I hope you like changing diapers!”
She replies: “Oh my god! Am I pregnant, am I pregnant!?”
To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
What’s the most common name for cancer patients?
Luke (leukemia)
How do you finger a feminist? Shake her hand and call her Theresa.
- Mommy, what will I be when I'm grown up?
- Shut up, Sam, you've got cancer!
Dark Humor is like a child with cancer. It never gets old.
Justin Masotti