Camera jokes
A team of cops and a news reporter are at a home where a violent crime has been committed. The head news reporter, in front of the camera, says, "A woman in this house has killed her husband because he stepped on the floor while she was mopping." He then turns around and asks a cop, "Has the woman been arrested yet?" The cop replies, "Not yet, we're waiting for the floor to dry."
Be careful, everybody, I have a red dot on my forehead, so I can record everybody!
My proctologist used to be a photographer. He took x-rays and told me to bend over and say "cheese!"
Why did the rapper always carry a camera?
Because he wanted to "capture" the rap star!
What’s something you can say in bed and in a Zoom meeting?
"Do you want the cameras on or off?"
When the emo girl is in a movie and the director says, "Cut."
The show COPS has been dropped from broadcast,
honoring the longstanding tradition of police turning off their cameras.
What do you get when a topless blonde rubs sun tanning oil on a topless brunette?
Your camera.
You know you’re not liked when you get handed the camera every time they take a group photo.
Horrible Jokes, Part One- A friend of mine got into photographing salmon in different clothing. He said he liked shooting fish in apparel.
Your mama is so fat, she needs two phones to take a picture of herself.
Wanna see a mistake go on camera and take a pic of you?
When an orphan takes a pic, is it known as a family picture? 📸
You know you're ugly when it comes to a group picture and they hand you the camera.
I photo bombed someone's selfie, and then they yelled, "Why would you do that? I was trying to take a family photo!"
I once told Siri, "Hey Siri, why am I still single?" She opened the front camera.
Bully: You're a loser and fat.
Me: Shut up. The camera thought you were a house.
The orphan's best friend wanted to meet his family, so he took a selfie.
Your mama is so ugly that when she walked in the bank, they had to turn off the cameras.
What do you call a Chinese man with a camera?
Phill Ming.