Call jokes
When I was walking home, a couple of married guys were saying, "Your mom is good at her job," but I realized my mom doesn't work.
So I ask my mom, "Why are these guys saying you're good at your job? You don't work." My mom said, "Yeah, I got a new job." So I said, "What do you do?" My mom said, "Job hand, no, I mean it's called a hand job."
What do you call it when Panera Bread commits genocide?
Panera bloodshed.
What do you call a router in a thong?
CISCO....(that thong thong thong thong!)
What do you call a wet condom?
A wet condom.
What do you call a cleaning skeleton?
The Grim Sweeper.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot wheels.
What do you call two gay Irishmen?
Patrick Fitz Gerald, and Gerald Fitz Patrick.
what happens when you accidentally taught your child to call every man daddy?
you find the real one.
What do you call a pig that does Karate?
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome on the beach?
A baked potato.
What do you call an imposter octopus?
Octosus.
what do you call a shadow stalker REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
What do you call an autistic ant? An Evelyn.
Why was the beach salty? Because the land didn't wave back. The ocean then called the land a beach.
I've patched 1,000 roofs, and they don't call you Boris the roof patcher. I've built 100,000 swords and shields, and they don't call you Boris the blacksmith, but you fuck one goat!
Call me a bad economy with high interest rates and low spending, 'cause I'm in a great depression.
What do you call a group of Alabama superheroes?
The Incredibles.
I heard Pixar is releasing a new movie.
It’s called Finding Chemo.
What do you call an orphan in a wheelchair running into fire? Hot Wheels.
What do you call a basement full of SJW's?
A whine cellar.