Call jokes
The teacher called Little Johnny to her desk. She said: “This essay you’ve written about your pet dog is exactly the same essay your brother has written.”
“Of course it is,” said Johnny. “It’s the same dog.”
What do you call an orphan's family tree?
A stump.
What is a leaf mixed with mud called? Ligma.
Ligma balls!
My brother apparently has this thing called "asthma". Anyway, I took his vape away today, and he was lying on the floor gasping for air, lol. He must really be addicted to it.
What do you call a person on fire in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels!
Memes
Why can’t orphans use a phone? Because they can't find the home button.
Elmo in 2022 is called "Tickle My Balls Elmo."
Why do prepubescent orphan girls love pedophiles? Because they get to call someone “Daddy”.
You know I used to call my dogs' balls the Twin Towers, until they came rumbling down.
What do you call a party planned by Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?
A high school pill party.
"Disease" technically means "lack of ease," so if a girl is hard to get, call her a disease.
That's what Elliot Rodger did.
Some of the most convincing people you'll ever listen to are born liars; usually they're called politicians.
What do you call identical tall people? Twin Towers.
What do you call a white man sandwiched between two black men in a blue sleeping bag?
An Oreo.
Why can’t orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call daddy.
What do you call a kid named Caitlyn?
My best friend.
ROBERT LEWANDISNEY SONG
Give me freedom. Give me fire. Give me contract, Or I retire.
Jog all day, Out of UCL now. FC Barcelona, I need you now.
Villarreal defenders, They surround me. Big submarines, All around me.
I get upset. Call my agent. I want money. I’m impatient.
What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
What do you call a gay man with a thicc ass?
Fruit cake.
What do you call an orphan in a room full of mirrors? Surrounded by loved ones.