Call jokes

What do you call an orphan family? None existent.

What do you call a baby on the battlefield?

Free shield!

What do you call it when Panera Bread is a book?

Panera Read.

Me calling the orphan kid from school: "Hello, are your parents home?"

The orphan kid: *starts sobbing* "STOP CALLING HERE!"

Bro, yesterday this bird made the weirdest chirp. It sounded something like this:

"Error code 6, 4, 4, 2, sound: bird call, failed to play, government drone 0, 7, 7, 5 requires maintenance."

Anyone know what bird that is?

I told a furry, "Don't call yourself a joke!" I said to the furry, "Joke has meanings."

What do you call a disabled person who deals drugs?

A wheel dealer.

What do you call a nazi that can’t see?

A nozi.

What do you call a swimming terrorist? A bath bomb.

What do you call a protest that gets crowded?

Human trafficking.

You call it turds.

I call it the forbidden chocolate.

I don't call it arson. I call it warming up.

Hellen Keller went to town riding a pony, stuck a feather in her hat, and called it an "Unnghhtpthhh!"

Why does the orphan like nature? He can call someone "mother."

The mailman came to drop the mail off.

Me (son): I went and told my mommy that daddy is home.

Mommy tells me, "You got no daddy."

Then I say, "I hear you always call the mailman daddy."

People were scared of the alligator because it ate everyone, so they called for the water god Aquarius.

He said "Sea ya later, alligator!" and he drowned.

What do you call a kid with 15 nukes and a shotgun?

The final countdown.

Why’s BBC called BBC?

The dude’s shlong gets bigger every time he says n-

What’s the difference between a dog and parents?

If an orphan calls their name, only the dog comes back.

What do you call a stupid pig? A pious.