Call jokes
What do you call vampire Matt Damon?
Bat Damon!
What do you call a band made of cheese?
Grate That!
What would you call a person who hides in a house for 24 hours and then kills them?
Morgz.
There was a guy called Manners, one called Poo, and one called Shut Up.
One day, Manners was on his way to pick up Poo from school. A police officer stopped Shut Up and said:
Police: "What’s you name?"
Shut Up: "Shut Up."
Police: "Where's your manners?!"
Shut Up: "Picking up Poo."
We have some leak in the fridge. I'm surprised nobody has called a plumber.
What do you call a laughing motorcycle?
A Yamahahahaha!
What do you call a three-humped camel? Pregnant.
Fun fact: Toasters were originally called tanning breads!
What do you call Dominos when it doesn't know how to cook pizza?
Domi-don't-knows...
What do you call the ghost of the Thanksgiving turkey? A Poultrygeist.
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
What do you call a pile of cheese? A cheese grater.
Why was it so hard for the pirate to call his mom? Because she left the phone off the hook!
What do u call a Muslim praying: Allahu akbar.
What do you call a surprised Chinese man?
Answer: Ho Lee Fuk.
What do you do when you see a lady in a wheelchair?
You grab a stick and put it through the wheelchair and call her nunchucks.
What do you call a gay retard? Fruit and vegetable soup.
Now it's time to make fun of Asians.
What do you call an Asian eating jelly? Yellow Jell-O.
What do you call a male robot who wants to be a girl?
A trans-former.
What do you call a cat that walks slowly?
CATerpillar
What is it called when someone is a wheel chair and in a fire?
Answer: Hot wheels...