Call jokes
So you know there's like dog mixes, right? Like a Snoodle and that stuff, right? So why can't a bulldog and a shih tzu be mixed? 'Cause if they did, it would be called bullshit.
What do you call a plate that lies? Dish-onest!
What do you call a prostitute with a major in math?
The thot that counts.
What do you call an orphan when he's taking a photo?
Family photo.
The teacher asked the class what sound does a cow make? "Mooo," said Sally. "Good job," said the teacher. "What sound does a sheep make?" "Baa," said Jack. "Good, now what sound does a pig make?" Little Johnny raised his hand really high in the sky. The teacher called on him. He said, "The pig says, 'Get on the ground and put your hands on your head, you black motherfucker.'"
Why is Santa always a b*tch, calling people names like, "Hoe, hoe, hoe?"
What's it called if you give a kid in a wheelchair a ball? Rocket League.
What do you call a person who died in war?
Little Johnny.
What do you call Peg and Cat from Peg + Cat? Egg + splat.
Eggy joke for all to enjoy!
Q: What do you call a cow stuck on a barb wire fence?
A: Udderly destroyed.
What is the state of California best for? Screwing everything up!
What is the state of Florida for? Rednecks for days!
What is the state of Texas for? Guns!
What is the state of Utah for? Mormons and Pligs baby! (I hate all of the religious stuff!)
What is the state of Idaho for? Calling other people Ho's, mostly!
What is the state of Nevada for? Ever heard of gambling?
What is the state of Delaware for? Literally anything that isn't exciting!
What is the state of New York for? In my state of mind, it's a song! (If you don't get this one, look up the song of New York State of Mind)
What do you call 6 gay men going to war?
Rainbow 6 Siege.
What do you call a gay man that is not a vegetarian?
A cocksucker.
What do you call an epileptic in a lettuce field?
Seizure salad.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
RC-XD incoming.
Stop ruining the jokes. It's called "worst jokes ever" for a reason. We all feel bad for orphans, but people like dark humor and joke about everyone, so quit being offended, please.
If someone calls you, just say:
"This is Peter's abortion clinic and pizza restaurant, where yesterday's loss is today's sauce!"
Why did the ACLU block the cellphone number of a Christian nationalist minister? Because the Christian nationalist had a virus on his cellphone and kept calling the ACLU because he wanted to join the ACLU because he wanted to become a card-carrying member of the ACLU.
Did you hear about the new Chinese food?
It is called: “Wuhan Fried Bats”!
What do you call an orphan at a construction site?
Child labor.