But jokes

I'd tell a bad baby joke, but I decided to abort.

Bro, you ever think while driving the moped why they call it a footrest when the foot never lets it rest? The foot is working harder than the engine. You push, push, but still go the same speed like a turtle with a bad mood during a rabbit race...

The orphan wanted to go on a field trip, but he needed his parent's signature.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.

But why was 10 scared? Because he is right in the middle of 9/11!

Why were the twin towers fighting?

Because they ordered pepperoni but got plain.

Kid 1: Words can't describe how ugly you are.

Kid 2: Words can describe how beautiful you are.

Kid 1: Aw, thanks!

Kid 2: But numbers can. 0/10

Okay, so one time a deaf kid got into a car accident, but he didn't herd in on the news.

The orphan tried to play baseball, but he couldn't get home because home doesn't exist for him.

Store owner: You have to be 40 inches tall to go into the adult section.

Kid: Please.

Store owner: Oh okay, but get on your tippy toes.

Kid: Everybody is hugging.

Fat women can't walk, but on 9/11, they ran.

I would tell you an abortion joke, but it was only temporary.

Last post for today, but I had to say one more thing! Tomorrow I am going to Six Flags, and I am literally so excited! It is going to be so much fun. Hope you guys have a good MLK JR. day! Woohooo!

Beauty is only skin deep... but ugly goes all the way to the bone!

Santa's sack is big because he only comes once a year, but his sack is SO BIG after containing the lovely eggnog he has that those weigh the sleigh.

He never had kids because he comes in the chimney.

Two antennas met on a roof and got married.

The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was incredible.

What's something an orphan likes but doesn't have?

A family.

I like sucking the Twin Towers off, but then I forgot dad already finished the job.

Dad: I’m taking your toys to the orphanage.

Child: But why?

Dad: Because you’re going to need them there.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friends' noses.

Does it cycle now? 🚲

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose 👃, but you can't pick your friends' noses 👃 👃 👃.