Building jokes
A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and sees a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running, building momentum before launching himself at the nun, catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head, knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement.
He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nun's ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habit and lifting her limp to her feet till face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace, the drunk victoriously growled, "You're not so bloody tough tonight, are ya, Batman?"
Where do you think all the orphans went?
In the World Trade Center, I trapped them in so they can finally get to their parents.
The last time I had flying lessons, I hit some building in Manhattan. Then my Uncle got shot in 2008. Darn...
Do you want to hear a joke about a construction?
Sorry, still working on it!
America: I'm going to build a wall.
Nazi: Been there.
Soviet Union: Done that.
I have a really good construction joke, but I’ll have to post it later because I’m still working on it.
Why are basements so scary? Cuz of the mail.
Three construction workers were sitting on the bridge that they were building, having their lunch break. The first guy says, "If I get a Vegemite sandwich again, I am going to jump off this bridge." The second guy says, "If I get a peanut butter sandwich again, I am going to jump off this bridge." The third guy says, "If I get another strawberry jam sandwich, then I am going to jump off this bridge." The next day, the first guy gets a Vegemite sandwich, the second guy gets a peanut butter sandwich, and the third guy gets a strawberry jam sandwich. All three guys jump off the bridge and die. The next day at their funerals, the first wife says, "If he just told me, I would have given him a different sandwich." The second guy's wife says, "It is all my fault. If only I knew." The third wife says, "I don't get it, he makes his own lunch."
Why do ghosts love elevators? They lift their spirits!
My teacher started talking about houses, then I said I don't want that informansion.
Never trust stairs, they're always up to something.
I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something :D
A man walked into a bar. No wait, a horse,
A man walked into a horse.
Why did the tall building fall?
It was September 11th.
Who are the Fastest Readers in the world?
9/11 victims: They read 87 stories in 10 seconds.
Yo mama's so stinky that whenever she walks into a building, the flies drop dead!
Stairs are bad, because they are always up to something.
Jimmy asks an elevator operator what he thinks of his job.
The operator shrugs and says, "It has its ups and downs!"
Why were the tenants of the Twin Towers sad?
They ordered a pepperoni pizza, but they got PLANE.
There were three people on the third floor of a building. The first one took a bite of an apple, then said it was too hard, so he threw it out the window. The second person took a bite of a lemon. He said it was too sour, so he threw it out the window. The third guy was drunk. He took a bite of a grenade and thought it was too crunchy, so he threw it out the window.
Then one of them went downstairs. He saw a dog laying on the ground dead. The apple had hit the dog in the head. Then there was a little girl crying with her cat in her lap. It had died because the lemon fell out the window and hit it in the head. Next, there was an old guy laughing. I asked him why he was laughing. He said, "I farted and the building behind me blew up."