Stairs are bad, because they are always up to something.
Jimmy asks an elevator operator what he thinks of his job.
The operator shrugs and says, "It has its ups and downs!"
Why were the tenants of the Twin Towers sad?
They ordered a pepperoni pizza, but they got PLANE.
There were three people on the third floor of a building. The first one took a bite of an apple, then said it was too hard, so he threw it out the window. The second person took a bite of a lemon. He said it was too sour, so he threw it out the window. The third guy was drunk. He took a bite of a grenade and thought it was too crunchy, so he threw it out the window.
Then one of them went downstairs. He saw a dog laying on the ground dead. The apple had hit the dog in the head. Then there was a little girl crying with her cat in her lap. It had died because the lemon fell out the window and hit it in the head. Next, there was an old guy laughing. I asked him why he was laughing. He said, "I farted and the building behind me blew up."
I love escalator jokes. There's not too many steps.
A burrito walked off a building.
Why were the Twin Towers angry?
They ordered pepperoni, and all they got was plane.
Who's the world's fastest reader?
9/11 victims. They went through 90 stories in 60 seconds.
I love stairs. They always bring me up.
What did the house wear to the party? A dress.
At night in the Nunnery, one Nun says to the other Nun, "Where's the candle?" The other Nun says, "Doesn't it!"
Rice Middle School
What does a skeleton put on his roof?
Shin-gulls.
What do you call an empty police station?
Banana Chicken.
This guy goes to the doctor and says, “I think I’m a wigwam, no, I think I’m a teepee, no, I must be a wigwam, no, a teepee.”
The doctor tells him, “I think I understand your problem. You’re two tents.”
The second twin tower is like Canada. It doesn’t exist.
I told my friend to fly a plane,
But he threw a ramp off a roof.
What is the difference between Bin Laden and Santa? One stops at the top of the skyscraper.
"Wanna hear a construction joke?"
"Yeah, sure."
"Wait, I'm still working on it!"
Q: Why did Sally fall off the building?
A: Her dad pushed her.
