Broke jokes

Yo mama so dumb, when her computer was asking for cookies, she grabbed a cookie, smashed it onto the screen, and broke the computer.

You're so fat that when Thanos snapped his finger, you broke the correction.

"Daveon, stop screaming for help because I broke your kneecaps!"

I asked Daveon if he ever considered trying something new, and he replied "why fix what ain't broke?"

I had a girlfriend who was a below-the-knee amputee. We broke up because she just couldn't keep her legs closed.

I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places.

He told me to stop going to those places.

Fat jokes and mom jokes😂

1. So fat when she sat on the toilet, she said, "A B C D E F G, get your fat ass off me."

2. So fat, your dad and her were in bed and tried to kiss. He’d have to slap her belly and ride the third wave up.

3. Yo mama so fat that when she went to Japan in a green bikini, they all started yelling, "Godzilla, Godzilla."

4. Your mama’s so fat when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

5. Bill was so fat when he stepped on the scale, it said "to be continued."

6. Yo mama so fat, she put on her lipstick with a paint-roller.

A doctor fell into a well and broke his collarbone.

The doctor should attend the sick and leave the well alone!

Yo momma so fat, her ankle broke and gravy poured out.

Hey, I broke up with your girl.

-Me: What? Why?

Wait, what?

-Me: You f**ked her, so it's your baby.

I broke up with my ex girlfriend. Here's her number.

Sike, that's the wrong number!

ooooooooooooooooooooo

My girlfriend broke up with me today, but it’s ok.

She said we can still be cousins.

My girlfriend broke up with me because I have a small dick. Too bad for her, because I give good sex.

"Knock Knock"

"Who's there?"

"John."

"John who?"

John broke down into tears as his Mother's Alzheimer's had gotten progressively worse.

Why did the man walk into a bar?

Because he just broke up and he needs alcohol, you dummy!

Jack and Jill went up to an abandoned house.

Jack drank too much and unzipped his fly. Jack said, "You know you wanna." Jill said, "No." So Jack locked both of them in the house and put a gag in Jill's mouth, tied her to a bed. He ripped off her dress and underwear. He took off his pants and his underwear too, then put on a condom. He then put a pill in her mouth and made her swallow. One minute later she was asleep. He took off her gag and mounted himself on her, then stuck his "candystick" in her mouth, next her fanny. Then his condom broke, but he was too drunk to notice. Nine months later a baby's born and Jack's in jail as the father.

My girlfriend broke up with me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back!

I was being interviewed by Elon Musk. He asked, "Where are you from?" and I said Portugal. He replied, "So you are a fellow countryman of a Pen merchant whose freekick ball broke my rover on Mars. Get out!!" Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Penaldo, for costing me my dream job!

Helen Keller threw the garbage out and broke a vehicle.

My wife called me ugly, and then when she found out how much money I actually make, she called me ugly and broke.