I met a man named Jebidiah on Xbox Live.
They finally released the audio recording from the black box in Kobe’s helicopter.
Apparently when the helicopter caught fire, Kobe was sitting right next to the only fire extinguisher. You could hear everyone screaming for him to put out the fire, but he couldn’t figure out how to use it. They begged and pleaded for him to give the extinguisher to anyone else... the last thing you hear is Kobe saying “I’d rather die than pass it!”
This man came up to me and asked if I could sell my house to him, and I said sure. Then five days later, he said that the loan should come in the mailbox. Then I checked the mailbox, and the only thing I saw was nothing, so I told the guy, "DEEZ NUTS IN YOUR MOUTH!"
I don't wanna brag, but I finished a puzzle in under a week, and it said 2-4 years on the box.
Bird Box.
Why can't a citizen in communist China, especially a Chinese male who is between 18-29 years old, buy a box of condoms in a drug store in communist China?
Because the condom would be too big for the penis of Chinese men in communist China.
Why do they call matches, matches?
They all look the same.
Others, tearfully: Stop shipping real people!!
Me, packing an old lady in a FedEx box: Nope!
What do you call a sociopath who damages a box of Wheaties? A cereal criminal!
Q: what is a box favourite sport
A: box-ketball
Yesterday I had a party. I got questioned about 5 dead kids died up locked in a box. I did that when I was 13 damn I forgot about them
when you have a box of dead babies in your garage and one of them is alive at the bottom and has to eat its way out but goes back for seconds.
Why did the emo kid cross the road? To get a box of tissues!
Your mama's like a cardboard box: open to the public and easy to nail.
How do you get a baby in a box? With a blender.
How is the world like a box of crayons?
Nobody likes the white ones.
And a side note, it's multi colored.
Yo mama soooo stupid she bought tickets *TO X-BOX LIVE*
Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.
A guy goes into the gas station and says, "I need a box of rubbers with pesticide."
The cashier said, "Pesticide? Don't you mean spermicide?"
The guy says, "No! My old lady has had a bug up her ass all week, and I am going to kill it."
Little Johnny attends school regularly and often brings a box of sultanas as a gift to his favorite teacher.
One morning Little Johnny attends class without a box of sultanas.
The teacher enquires, why Johnny "where is my box of sultanas?"
Johnny replied, "Sorry, miss, my rabbit died."