Body jokes
Roses are red, violets are blue, You're so flat we can play chess on your chest!
Your mother is so fat that her BMI (Body Mass Index) exceeds 40, therefore classifying her as morbidly obese.
I know 5 fat people; you're 4 of them.
Your mum so fat that when she sat down she said, "Why are there so many people under me?"
Did you hear about the guy whose left side was cut off? He's all right now.
Your mom is so fat that she cannot look at her feet when taking a shower.
Don't you feel an empty feeling...
IN YOUR SKULL!
Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?
Because they have no body to go with.
I was going to think of a good amputee joke...
But I’m stumped.
Your mom is so fat that she works as a hydraulic press in a car factory!
When I’m bored, I text a random number, “I hid the body... now what?”
Yo mama so fat that when she was in Uranus, she picked her butthole.
Let's play twin towers, your thighs are the towers and my penis is the plane, coming in between.
I had a steering wheel down my pants, and I tell you what, it was driving my balls crazy!
Yo mama so fat that when he was talking to a man, her bowels fell out.
What do you call a flat-chested emo?
A cutting board.
How does a skeleton call his friends?
On the tele-bone!
What is the only warm organ in a dead woman?
My dick!
What happens when you have dry elbows at work?
You don't have any elbow grease to put into it.
If you scanned my thigh, it would show up as a package of Oreos on the screen.