Body jokes
What do you call a flat-chested emo?
A cutting board.
How does a skeleton call his friends?
On the tele-bone!
What is the only warm organ in a dead woman?
My dick!
What happens when you have dry elbows at work?
You don't have any elbow grease to put into it.
If you scanned my thigh, it would show up as a package of Oreos on the screen.
"Did you hear about the guy who got the left side of his body amputated? He’s all right now."
I have a question: Does aging affect corpses, too?
Just asking to know if I still count as a pedophile or not!
How are Kentucky Fried Chicken and a woman the same?
Once you take away the legs and the breasts, you’re left with one greasy box to put your bone in.
Not a joke but there's nowhere else to post this, (mainly this post is for the broke people without a gym). Did you know that the body can't tell if you're using weights? So lifting weights are optional.
Some beginner workouts without weights for like really weak people:
1. Sit-ups 10 reps 2. Push-ups 20 per reps 3. Squats 10 per reps 4. Crunches 10 per reps
What did the elephant say to the naked man?
"How do you breathe through that tiny thing?"
So, you're into pronouns? Let me she/them titties.
Does that dick match that forehead? 👀
How do cats relieve themselves in front of people? By licking their puss.
I was trying to make homemade baby powder until I realized it isn't made from babies, oops wrong ingredient... smh
One time, I was working this steamroller when the guy who I squashed farted.
I guess that’s what you call “FLAT”ulence.
My guy: I have a Q-Tip.
Me: You can Q my tip.
My guy: Ayo!
If you swallow gum, it will make your poop bouncy.
What is the difference between paying $50.00 to receive an anonymous blow job from a physically challenged gay white male who is also a sex worker at a glory hole and paying $175.00 to receive an anonymous blow job from an able-bodied bisexual white female who is also a sex worker at a glory hole?
If you give $50.00 to receive an anonymous blow job from a physically challenged gay white male who is also a sex worker at a glory hole you are saving yourself $125.00. 💸😁
I love the word legs.
Wanna help me spread the word?
Why do physically challenged gay men suck dick better than females who are able-bodied and heterosexual?
Because physically challenged gay men do it best! 👏 🙌 👍👍 👌 👌 💪 💪 🥰 😊 😃 😄 😁 😍 💖 ❤️ 💖 ❣️ 💕 💘