Blue jokes

What do us emos all have in common?

Depression. Anxiety. The sole desire to just start saying you wanna kys right out of the blue a lot and saying "I CAN'T WAIT TO JUMP OF THAT BUILDING SOON!" and other people say, "Idgaf, do it, all of us would be happy."

I saw this girl with blue hair and slapped her wrist and said, “NICE CUT G!”

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your wife needs Jon Grudon, too.

Q. What color were Mohammed Atta’s eyes?

A. Blue, one blue this way and one blue the other way.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Ur blue nue hue kuo.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, A face like yours belongs in the zoo, But don't you worry, I'll be there too, Not in a cage, but laughing at you!

Kid sees their grandma taking pills and asks...

"Grandma, why do you need to take all those pills?"

"Well, Grandma needs to take the green medicine for her headaches, but the green pills give her diarrhea. So grandma needs to take the yellow pills for diarrhea, but those pills always make grandma very depressed. Because of her depression, grandma needs to take the black pills, but those always give her high blood pressure. To cure the high blood pressure, grandma has to take the red pills, but those make her always very horny. That's why grandpa has to take the blue pills."

Roses are red, violets are blue, I took a poo, and it smelt like you.

BlessedBrian's face is like a mood ring... it turns blue whenever I'M around.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Cause comes near my Willy.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The third one's for you.

The teacher asked her class to use "definitely" in a sentence. Little Johnny raised his hand to answer, yet the teacher passed him and went on to Kevin. "The sky is definitely blue." "Very good Kevin, but the sky can also be blue or black," the teacher replied.

Little Johnny raised his hand again as high as he could, yet the teacher passed right over him and picked Annie from the back of the room. "The grass is definitely green." "Very good Annie, but it can also be brown." Little Johnny was waving his hand like crazy seeking her attention. Finally, she called on him. "Mine's more of a question, but do farts have lumps in them?" "Why no, Johnny, why would you ask such a question?" She questioned. "Well, if they don't have lumps in them, then I definitely just shit myself."

Roses are red, violets are blue, I buttfucked Scooby Doo.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Mike Pence's hair is made of glue.

How do you make people mad? You use the wrong category. It makes them go red.

Roses are red, violets are blue, that joke is old, just like you.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Atoms are small, But so are you!

Roses are red, violets are blue,

Your mum's so fat, she broke Britain too!

Roses are red, violets are blue, feminist pussy stinks, and yours does too.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I need your peach, and I'll torture you with a speech.