Blue

Blue jokes

Comment

What was the comment that Vice President Harris said in the United States Senate when a blue dog democrat in the United States Senate called Vice President Harris a bitch?

Kibbles 'N Bits!! Kibbles 'N Bits!! I is going to get me some Kibbles 'N Bits!!

Poem

My girlfriend's sister told me to write her a poem. This is what I came up with:

roses are red, violets are blue, if you ever feel alone, I'm always watching you.

Suicide

Roses are red, violets are blue, you know what else is violent? Suicide with me and you.

Pikachu

Latias is red.

Latios is blue.

You should always remember to put up your curtains because I Pikachu.

Rose

Roses are red, Violets are blue, All the worse jokes come from you.

Memes

Color

Girls: OMG what color should I use, baby blue, light blue, or navy blue?

Boys: blue is blue.

Duck

What do you get when you dip a duck in blue paint?

A very pissed duck.

Donkey

Roses are red,

Violets are blue, you look like a donkey, and smell like one, too.

Flag

Meaning behind the German flag: 🇩🇪 Black: culture Red: Beer Yellow: Sausage Blue: Winning world wars.

Eye

What colors were Kurt Cobain's eyes? Blue! One blew right and the other blew up!

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  • Earth

    What is blue, green, flat, and has teeth?

    The Earth, but I lied about the teeth.

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  • Bedbug

    Good night, sleep tight, don't let the bedbugs bite, and if they do, hit them with a shoe till they're all black and blue!

    Mom

    Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. And your mom is, too.

    Life

    Your life literally is as valuable as a summer ant. I'm just gonna stomp you, you're gonna keep coming back, I'm gonna seal up all my cracks, you're gonna keep coming back, why? Cause you keep smelling the syrup, you worthless bitchass nlgga! You're gonna stay on my dick until you die. You serve no purpose in life, your purpose in life is to be on my stream sucking on my dick daily. Your purpose in life is to be in that chat blowing a dick daily. Your life is nothing, you serve ZERO purpose. You should kill yourself, NOW! And give somebody else a piece of that oxygen and ozone layer that's covered up so we can breathe inside this blue trapped bubble. Cause what are you here for? To worship me? Kill yourself! I mean that with a hundred percent with a thousand percent.

    Priest

    Man: I must confess, Father.

    Priest: What are you here to confess?

    Man: I hit my wife and blamed her for what happened to our son.

    Priest: And what happened to your son?

    Man: He said a man raped him.

    Priest: When and where did this happen?

    Man: A local church. I don't know which one.

    Priest: ...By whom?

    Man: A priest, he said. He said the priest had black hair and blue eyes, kind of like you.

    Priest: ...Shit

    Penis

    Roses are red, violets are blue, your penis smells like stew, and I want to eat it too.

    Emo

    Roses are red, Violets are blue, Oh, you wanna die? I wanna die too!

    Queue

    Roses are red.

    Your passports are blue.

    Now go stand over there,

    In that very long queue!

    Uncle

    Roses are red, violets are blue, like my hole, Uncle Bill is making me full, better run here he comes!

    Dead

    I could be red, I could be orange, I could be yellow, I could be green, I could be blue, I could be purple, but I would be dead.