Blind jokes
How do you blind an Irish woman?
You put a bottle of Scotch in front of her.
How does a blind person wipe their ass?
With braille toilet paper.
What do blind people and orphans have in common?
They both can't see their parents.
What does the blind, deaf child get for Christmas?
Cancer.
What did the guy with no teeth say to a blind guy... How many fingers am I holding up?
someting you should not send your blind friends
You're so bald, the reflection off your head is blinding people in India.
What did the boy say to the girl? "Damn! You pissy, stank!"
What did Helen Keller do when she fell down a well?
Screamed till her hands fell off.
A blind teenager who is bad at reading wants to go hunting, so he finds a hunting ground called s-ch-ool.
A blind man walked into me at a store. I said, "Watch it, bitch!" and he said, "Sorry, I didn't see you there."
What did a comedian say at a show full of blind people?
"What's up?"
How does a blind person know they've wiped their ass enough?
How did the blind girl get a date?
She said it was love at first sight.
Blind people driving on the highway would be the world's biggest, and shortest game of bumper cars!
This for you roman y e e e nt
A blind man is going for a walk. Eventually, he reaches a fish market.
He yells, "Hello ladies!"
Molly Burke and her mom were on a walk. Molly walked into a bar; her mom laughed and walked under it.
If blind people could play go-kart, it very quickly turns into bumper cars.
What do starving kids call Venetian blinds?
Bunk beds.
A girl walks up to her blind friend who she had not seen in a while and says: "Long time no see!"