Behavior jokes

One day Little Johnny saw his grandpa smoking a cigar. Johnny said, "Can I have a puff?"

Grandpa said, "Can your dick touch your ass?"

Johnny said, "No, then that's your answer."

Later that day, Johnny saw his grandpa drinking a drink. Johnny said, "Can I have a sip?"

Grandpa said the same thing, "Can your dick touch your ass?"

Johnny said, "No, then that's your answer."

Later that night, Johnny was eating some cookies in the kitchen. Grandpa said, "Hi son, can I have a cookie?"

Johnny said, "Can your dick touch your ass?"

Grandpa said, "Yes."

Johnny said, "Good, go fuck yourself!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

Why can you bully orphans?

What are they gonna do, tell their parents? Oh wait, they got no parents.

If a kid does not go to sleep during nap time, isn't he resisting a rest?

After I see an anime boy acting cool,

Me at school acting cool:

My brothers: "He's just acting cool."

Me: I'm gonna kill u 0.0

If you're ever bored, just bully an orphan. What are they gonna do? Cry to their mama and father?

I got caught peeing in the pool.

The lifeguard blew his whistle so hard I nearly fell in!

I’m always the first person in line at school for lunch.

I just cut everyone.

There were once these two twins. One twin, no matter what happened, was always pissed off, while the other one was always happy.

This baffled scientists, so they ran an experiment on the twins to figure out what was happening. They took the angry one and left him in a room with all of the latest technology and the most expensive toys and left him overnight. When they came back, he was still grumpy. When they asked him why, he said, "None of these are actually mine, and you left me in here all night, so I'm angry!"

His explanation was reasonable, so they ran another experiment on the other kid. This time, they left him overnight in a room that was literally just filled with horse shit. When they came back to check on him the next morning, he was still smiling. When they asked him why, he said, "With all of this horse crap, there has to be a pony in here somewhere!"

Guys, if y'all don't stop making hatred stuff, I'm contacting admin.

If you're a simp, just remember, it means "Suckers Idolizing Mediocre Pussy."

It's better to let someone think you are an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.

My friend Andrew once told me that "weird is high and drunk at the same time."

Daniel takes his frustrations out on Shaenaya and his sexual frustrations out on Arunima.

Science experts say when you get mad, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

I take all my anger out on orphans. Why?

Because they have no parents to run to.

Why are gay men so rude? Because they're fucking assholes.

You lot are sick sons of bitches!

Have you ever tried anal bleaching?

It really helps assholes lighten up.

I am the least serious person ever, but whoever is joking about cancer is vile :)

Get some fucking respect, you silly tramp!