Behavior jokes
My uncle is an alchemist.
He can turn 3 bottles of beer into 4 hours of abuse.
Two cannibals are eating a clown.
One says to the other one, "Does this taste funny to you?"
I think my dad's gay because he goes out with his mates to get milk but never returns.
The first thing the emo did at the party is to pin the gun to their head.
Mom told me drugs are my enemies.
Jesus said to like your enemies.
Yay, I can like drugs then!
Memes
A meme for guys
What do you call a dumb and mean crocodile?
A crookodile.
When you see an "Autistic child zone" sign and say, "Oh! That wasn't a dog."
Video games don't make people violent, lag does.
Why are gay guys so rude?
Because they’re fucking assholes.
Me: *posts random joke about a duck*
That one guy in the comment section for no reason: "Shut the f*uck up you dumb b*tch you are a piece of sh*t you..."
That other guy in the comment section: "That’s actually offensive to ducks."
Bro it’s a joke...
Are you sure your father isn't a thief?
Because he stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.
I asked my daddy what sex was. He said, "Wanna cum and try it?"
Me, calls the police*
Me: Hey, I'm gonna commit suicide!
Cop on the phone: Please wait till we get there.
Me: Why, so you can then stop me?
Cop on the phone: No, we just want a murder, not a suicidal report on your paper... and we are all bored!
Me: Ok, my house number is *********************, ok!
Cop on the phone: Awesome! Just a sec. *whispers* Guys, I finally found someone who wants to get killed!
Little Johnny was getting beaten up by two kids, so I came and helped.
He won’t stand against the three of us!
Do you know pigeons die when they have sex?
I mean, the one I fucked died.
I was up all night because my neighbors were having sex.
*I was actually up all night watching.*
Like if you meet someone emo.
I wrote a passage to stop about bullying, and it was easy. Do you know why?
Because I am a bully!
What do a friend and a mouse have in common? They will both be angry if you throw bricks at them.
My favorite species is a cheetah because
Ima cheet-ah on the test.