Tiktoker: I will kill anyone who pours milk before cereal.
Depressed kid tiktok reply: *pours milk before cereal, pours cereal then takes a bite* I'll wait.
Behavior Jokes
My last relationship ended because my ex-girlfriend accused me of being a rapist. I'm not upset. To be honest, I didn't like her anyway. She kept telling me I never listen, or something like that.
Dad: If you study, then I will buy you a new iPhone.
Son: Okay, I'll do it!
5 hours later...
Son: I'm done!
Dad: I lied.
Son: So did I!
A special quote: “No, Mackenzie! You're the savage beast!”
What do emos and ninjas both have in common? They both hide and cut things.
Why does Joe Biden call women muffins?
'Cause muffins backwards is sniffum.
One time, little Johnny was watching TikTok, and he saw a toy that he wanted so badly, so he cleaned up the whole house and did his homework. When he was done, he saw a spill on the table. He went to the sink to grab a cloth, but when he came back, it was gone. He went to his mom's room and saw a drink with the label "daddy's drink," so he drunk it and said, "It's daddy's; he won't mind," and all day he was like the Flash. So he went back, turned the bottle around, and it said "Speedy," and then he said, "Oh, great heavens!"
My enemy likes to act like he’s stupid sometimes, and so once he asked me what a sin was, and I responded with, “you.”
Lesson in laziness number 136894236842: don't be too lazy to read large numbers.
When I see two lovers' names on a tree, I don’t find it cute or funny. I think, why would they be bringing a knife on a date?
How do you make an emo jump? Tell him to go to the roof.
Why did the emo kid cross the road? To get a box of tissues!
If a lion ate a child, is the lion a child predator?
Today, I saw my friend go crazy eating her ham sandwich. When she went to the bathroom, I checked inside her ham sandwich, and there were fresh drugs.
Bully says, "You are DISGUSTING!!!!!!"
The girl says, "Just like your face."
My mom said my sister was an angel, but when I threw her out the window, she didn't fly.
What happens when an emo goes to the grocery store? The cashier scans their wrist too.
My uncles like the moon.
He comes out at night.
Mother, father, and a son. Father purchased a robot that can detect lies. The robot slaps when you lie.
During dinner time: Father: Son, what have you done today? Son: I watched Netflix, Dad. Robot: Stood up and slapped the son! Son: Okay! Okay! I watched porn, Dad. Dad: What? You watched porn? You are only 14! I never knew porn till I was 18 years of age. Robot: Stood up and slapped the Dad! Mother: Started to laugh and said "Sure he is your son!" Robot: Stood up and slapped the mother!
Hehe
I got detention one day. I don’t know why; I only slapped the emo kid on the wrist.
