Behavior jokes
My uncles like the moon.
He comes out at night.
Mother, father, and a son. Father purchased a robot that can detect lies. The robot slaps when you lie.
During dinner time: Father: Son, what have you done today? Son: I watched Netflix, Dad. Robot: Stood up and slapped the son! Son: Okay! Okay! I watched porn, Dad. Dad: What? You watched porn? You are only 14! I never knew porn till I was 18 years of age. Robot: Stood up and slapped the Dad! Mother: Started to laugh and said "Sure he is your son!" Robot: Stood up and slapped the mother!
Hehe
I got detention one day. I don’t know why; I only slapped the emo kid on the wrist.
If you're ever frustrated, just punch them in the face. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
When someone says don't talk back to me, say, "I wasn't aware that answering a question was considered talking back."
What do 2 emo kids say to each other?
"I like ya cut, G."
*Slaps wrist*
For some reason, when my mom eats hot dogs, she likes to lick and suck on it first. As a son, can anyone tell me why?
Really gotta love all the morons who, instead of sharing irreverent dark jokes, say the stupidest shit pertaining to Christianism.
Teacher: Okay class, look at the person to the right of you and describe them with one word.
Me: *looks to the right of me and sees the pick-me girl* "Penny."
Teacher: *shocked* How is she a penny?
Me: 'Cause she's two-faced, flat, and always in someone's pants. Not to mention worth practically nothing.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they are all crying in a dark corner.
When you see someone, you say, "Go suck bananas."
It's better to let someone think you are an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it.
How do you get a black kid to stop jumping on your bed? Put velcro on the ceiling.
What do you call a suspicious dog?
A sussy bark-er.
Straight men change their girlfriends like they change their undies. So, about once a month.
I got barred from Weight Watchers today.
It wasn't my fault; it was the fat ass next to me who spilled her box of Maltesers onto the floor in the middle of the room. All I did was say that it was the funniest game of Hungry Hungry Hippos that I have ever seen.
I pushed a disabled kid over, and he came crawling back to me.
When you see a kid yelling and you wanna leave :(((((((
Did you know emos are the highest jumpers? Some of them are still in the air.
Bro, I saw two dudes kissing LOL, but not regular kissing.