A young peasant coming from the field with his scythe on his shoulder notices an attractive young woman that was doing the laundry in a mountain stream, perched on some rocks near a waterfall. The guy stops and leans against his scythe, fascinated by the young girl's beauty. After minutes of watching her, she loses her balance, slips on a rock and falls all the way down, crushing her head on the white rocks. Thoughtful, he puts his scythe back on his shoulder and walks away, saying to himself "Damn, another washing machine destroyed by limestone!".
Two people are in a restaurant. Person #1 doesn’t order anything and person #2 orders a chili.
Person #1: Aren’t you gonna eat your bowl of chili?
Person #2: No you can have it.
Person #1: Ok, thanks...
Person 1 starts eating his food only to find half of a dead rat! He vomits all of the food back into the bowl.
Person #2: That’s about as far as I got too!
Yo hairline go so back it touch Jupiter
“Dude come here and see a rabbit!”
“Ok!”
“Are u ok man?”
“Yeah I’m fine”
“Dude pull your pants back up!
Ur hairline is so repulsive that my entire family got eye cancer from seeing it and it goes so far back that you be looking like vegeta.
Why do you not have milk with your Oreos
Daddy never came back with the milk
I was in math class, when my teacher gave us homework, and she said to me "your gonna get a F this time" So I went back home, and F**k my teacher.
A German, an Australian, and a Mexican are on a plane. They say that they can tell where they are by sticking their hands out of the pane.
The German sticks his hand out and says "We are in Germany." The others ask, "How do you know," the German says, "Because it's so cold."
Then the Australian sticks his hand out and says "We are in Australia," the others ask "How do you know," he replies "Because it's so warm."
Then the Mexican sticks his hand out and back in. He says " We are in Mexico," the others ask "How do you know," he says " Because my watch is gone"
why do orphin's have water with there ceral because the dad never came back with the milk
I can't decide if i like rocking chairs or not..I keep going back and forth on them.
An Asian man walks into a bar in Australia. The bartender says to him “why are you here? Get back in that wing wong country”. The Asian man says “I’m here travelling and now I’m gonna attack you with my 40 gallons of friend rice I’ve had in my pocket since wa dinowar wages. #wingwong
why did the orphan like milk???cause their parents went to get milk and never came back
Your hairs line goes so far back that cars on a highway don't know wich Way to turn.
Jesus got rejected. A few years later he died. He came back just to lose his virginity because even jesus is not a fucking cunt. Get off this site and go have some sex you fucking virgins.
The two brothers were sitting next to each other. They played with planes all day long. They got to violent and now their sister(World Trade Center) stands there. The brothers were put up for adoption and the planes were given back to their owners.
why do orphan's hate any milk? there dad did not come back for 10 years oh sorry he got lost in the store🤧
DAD: son i came back SON: where is the milk? DAD: time for another 10 years
i went took out he trash could not find you so i went back in the next they i found you
why do pedophiles come in last place for every race... because they are always un the back ( if you know what i mean) :}
A Teacher asked her young students to get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and one by one, began to tell their stories. There were all the regular type of stuff.
But then the teacher realized that only Janie was left. "Janie, do you have a story to share ?’ ''Yes madam...My daddy told me a story about my Mom " “OK, let’s hear” said the teacher.
“My Mom was a Marine pilot in Operation Desert Storm in Iraq and her plane got hit”. “She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol and a survival knife”. “She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn’t break and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops.” “She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands.”
Pin drop silence in the class !!
''Good Heavens" said the horrified teacher “What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story ?”
“Stay away from Mummy when she’s drunk```...!!!”
