Baby jokes
I gotta song for Hawaii, baby, you light up my world like nobody else.
How do you fit a hundred babies into a small bucket?
With a blender.
What is 6 inches long and makes women scream? Stillbirth...
How do you stop a baby from drowning?
Take your foot off its head.
What’s someone with AIDS' favorite Taylor Swift song?
"Baby, now we got bad blood."
What is the difference between a baby and a canoe?
I would never put a canoe in my garage.
What do you call a baby potato?
Small fry!
Say, Aiden, are you and Gwen dating? Oooo, you and her sitting in a tree, K.I.S.S.I.N.G., then comes the romance, then comes engagement, then comes the wedding, and then the baby! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Then comes cheating and arguments, and then D.I.V.O.R.C.E.!!!!!!!!!!!!
Aiden + Gwen = Husband and wife! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
Girlfriend and boyfriend!!!!!!!!
Why did the United Nations stop the French government from using the guillotine in public?
Because the French government was using the guillotine on newborn babies for circumcision.
Why did the shark fisherman stop at the abortion clinic?
Because dead babies make the best chum! :)
I fucked your mom, that's why I've been paying your life support since you were born.
Q. What do you call a baby with anencephaly? A. Anything you want, it's not like it's gonna answer you.
Baby Shark be like, "It's the END," bruh, they dead.
Q: How do you make a fire?
A: Oil and dead babies.
How did Mary get pregnant with baby Jesus?
God fucked her.
What did the father bullet say to the baby bullet when he killed a bull by hitting it in the eye: "Bull's eye!"
What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? I don’t know. I was too busy wanking.
I approached her in the checkout line and said, "Yo baby wassup?"
What do you call a baby in an elevator?
Lubrication.
Alabama.
Every time there's a family reunion, a baby is born 9 months later.