What's worse than locking your keyes in the car in front of an abortion clinic?
Having to go back inside and ask to borrow a hanger.
What does a depressed person and a jacket have in common?
They’re both hanging in the closet
What something the same about a depress kid anda hanger they both like to hang
What's a similarity Cliff Hanger and Nooses?
They both leave you Hanging
Did you know that your son has been deeper inside of your wife then you have...unless you put the coat hanger up there
You don't usually see strap-hangers carrying newspapers these days. But one guy with the New York Times is seen getting on a crowded F Train. He notices a single seat not taken. Suspicious, he gets closer and sniffs it out. The seat is discolored but dry. Throwing caution to the winds, he removes a section from the paper and sets it down to buffer the spot from his behind. He sits down, stretches his feet and yells out: "Try sitting on your smartphones, suckers!"