Baby jokes
What is the best way to catch a baby from falling off the roof?
With a pitchfork.
Man says, "What's Ligma?"
Woman says, "Ligma balls!"
Baby says nothing, she transgender.
How do you know the baby's dead? The dog plays with it more.
What does Kylie Jenner feed her baby? Plastic MILK! LOL
If your wife dies of childbirth, can you press charges on the baby?
Memes
Me: I'm sorry, Aaron.
Aaron: Why?
Me: Your parents couldn't be bothered to look past page one in the big book of baby names.
Crying babies are like parties. No matter how many times you try to end it, it keeps going.
What's the difference between a baby and a cooked chicken?
Several hundred calories.
Have you ever seen a baby unicorn? No! Because unicorns are gay rainbows in equine form.
What's Stephen Hawking's other favorite song?
Steve Winwood's "Just Roll with It Baby."
What's the difference between a baby and putty?
You can only eat one.
Q: Why did the baby cross the road?
A: It wasn't in its car seat.
I have no dad, no milk, and no mom, so that means no tits, like if you can relate.
I'd tell a bad baby joke, but I decided to abort.
How do Taliban parents feed their babies?
"Here comes the plane... weeee, BOOM! 💥"
Mom: Please eat, baby!
Baby: No!
Mom: Here comes the airplane!
Why can’t the baby cross the road?
Walls.
What's pink, red, and silver and bumps into walls?
A baby with forks in its eyes.
You should always wash your sex toys. That's why priests baptize babies.
Moto Moto, stop giving the baby your d*ck!