Pile jokes
I just came across a pile of cash in the parking lot.
Usually I just use tissues.
What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowntain.
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Because it wasn’t peeling very well.
How did a man know his wife died?
Dishis start piling up.
What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
What do you call a pile of cheese? A cheese grater.
I thought it said holo..
What do you call a flat cabbage?
A leaf pile.
What does "the whole pile of poops" mean?
"The whole pile of shits."
How do you tell when your wife is dead?
The sex is the same, but the dishes pile up.
Did you hear about the two-car pile-up in Mexico? Yeah like 200 Mexicans died.
Dad: "If they jumped off a bridge, would you?"
Tommy: "Yes, cuz there would be a body pile to break my fall!"
What's better than a pile of dead babies?
One that's alive in the middle that has to eat its way out.
What do you call a chicken staring at a pile of lettuce?
A chicken sees a salad.
(Say it out loud if you don't get it!)
Q: What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies?
A: A Lamborghini isn't a very fun hobby.
What do you call a pile of cats? A MEOW-tain.
The other day a squirrel asked me for a job. I asked him, "What jobs did you have previously?"
Calmly he answered, "I am a pilot. I can pick it up from here and pile it over there. I also can fly a sign!"
"Too bad, this is a nut cannery, and we're 100% automated. We don't need anyone at this time, sorry."
"No worries, I'm totally nuts anyway. Guess I'll fly a sign across town, don't have bus fare!"
What is scarier than a pile of dead babies?
The bottom one ate its way out!
What's the difference between a pile of 100 dead babies and a Mustang Challenger?
A Mustang Challenger doesn't exist.
What's worse than a dead baby?
A pile of dead babies. What's worse than that? The one on the bottom is alive. And what's worst than that is, the baby has to eat its way out.
How do you know if your wife is dead?
Sex is the same, but the dishes keep piling up.
*Breaking News!* - Apparently the first person in Melbourne has died because of the Coronavirus. In his house they found 1000 cans of food, 50 kilos of pasta, 80 kilos of rice, 300 toilet rolls and 50L of hand sanitiser which he had panic purchased from the supermarket and stockpiled "just in case".
The whole lot collapsed and buried him.