Away

Away jokes

School

    • I barged into a Halloween party at my school with my air-soft AR-15!

    I was so scary, EVERYONE ran away!

    Pear

    • I will tell you a story. There was a fruit named Pear who was named Dyck. He one day met his friend Carrot, who was later killed after being stuck into some girl's vagina.

    Pear then became very sadistic and no one loved him, and he became mentally fruit-pressed. One day he met a Banana named Harvey Weinstein, and they got married and had children who were all named Minion. Eventually, the rest of his family died, and Pear was left slowly rotting away. His last words were, "I have finally 'peared' the consequences of all my actions."

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    • Child

    • "Peado van, peado van, stay away, peado van, peado van, take her away."

    I can't afford food, I can't afford childcare, might as well just get the money out of her.

    Pedo

    • I was listening to my children praying, and my youngest that can speak said to me: "Mama, why is Gramma dead?"

    I smiled and told her, "Well, less than 10 years ago when I was 5, your age, my Momma took me into the basement with some hot rando during a party. And 9 months later Shinana was born. One Pedo after another and your 4 siblings were born. The Pedo I met last night told me, 'If your mother's the one making you do this, do what you do best.' I listened and the next day she didn't leave her bed breathing. When the Pedo found out he left me and your soon to be brother."

    She replies with, "Make his child support expensive!" Now he has to pay me 2,000 U.S. dollars every month, like the other ones that ran away.

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    • Fruit

    • Fruit is like life. You slowly eat it away as it slowly also begins to rot like everyone I’ve known.

    Away memes

    Orphan

    • Why can orphans get away with being bad at school? Because when the teacher says, "I want to have a parent/teacher conference," they just go about their day.

    Dog

    • Why did Helen Keller’s dog run away?

    You’d run away too if your name was afjlkawihrs gdfn wjasidphbfvnas icxhuvbjsdlk m.nd;fuoxcghkfjckoSZ: lF,.XMAVUDOXICUGJNWLFXCMV CKLSAXHV IJADHXC;IVKSA.

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    • Man

    • How do you keep a homophobic heterosexual man that is a minister and a Christian nationalist with blond hair in suspense?

    Wait until Christmas to take away his church's tax-exempt status or he will call the ACLU.

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    • Woman

    • How are Kentucky Fried Chicken and a woman the same?

    Once you take away the legs and the breasts, you’re left with one greasy box to put your bone in.

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    • Girlfriend

    • My girlfriend passed away recently.

    At the funeral, everyone was shocked about it.

    Still, even when dead, she is the best shag I've ever known.

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    • Cow

    • My joke: You have to guess, answers come at 3:00. Why did the cow jump into space?

    Hint... it smelled its favorite food 🍱 and saw its future!

    That hint was technically the whole answer. Can you guess in 3 hours? Lol, I will be posting every time, and my giveaway starts at 5:00: my mega fly ride bat dragon 🐉 and five jungle eggs.