Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore – my face should be among them.
If I grew a nanometer taller for every 2/10 woman expecting a 6’3”+ guy, I would be considered attractive💀
ye eli is hot
Girl: I’m so in love with you! Boy: me too. I think you’re abcdefghijk: - aesthetic, beautiful, cool, determined, elegant, famous, hot. Girl: whats the ijk? Boy: I’m just kidding
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
My mom is a chemistry teacher. Mom: you can’t be attracted to something without it being attracted to you back Me: tell that to my FU*KING CRUSH B*TCH
Guy 2 whispering : oh i got tired of acting gay
Guy 1: i heard you, why are you acting gay ?
Guy 2: to attract gays and then give them an advice
Guy 1: so what's your advice to me ?
Guy 2: that i just know you're gay
LoL xD
A young peasant coming from the field with his scythe on his shoulder notices an attractive young woman that was doing the laundry in a mountain stream, perched on some rocks near a waterfall. The guy stops and leans against his scythe, fascinated by the young girl's beauty. After minutes of watching her, she loses her balance, slips on a rock and falls all the way down, crushing her head on the white rocks. Thoughtful, he puts his scythe back on his shoulder and walks away, saying to himself "Damn, another washing machine destroyed by limestone!".
What do you call a sexually attracted pizza who spoons another pizza?
A Topping.
I was always to I’m to small to ride but every girl I’ve been with rated me a 9.5
I’m horny and gay
Did you just come from a bakery? Because you’ve got the hottest pair of buns I’ve seen all week.
Interviewer: what are your strengths? Interviewee: I fall in love easily. Interviewer: and your weaknesses? Interviewee: those beautiful green eyes of yours...
me: breath right now if u wanna date me
Your really sexy 😉
why is the sun so attractive? because it is burning hot!
best friend *hold a sign up that says "what gender are you"* Me:uh male?.. best frend *then unfolds paper so it reads "what gender are you attracted to?"* Me: you silly goose *silence for like three sec* Me:still male though-
I hit on the twin towers. they were hot
I saw a pretty girl walking outside. I asked for her number. We met up and began to have sex. She told me to turn over which was weird. I felt a stinging pain in my ass all of a sudden
One time, I bought a magnet, my wife asked why I bought it. I said I couldn't help myself, I felt attracted to it.
