Attraction jokes

I’m on top of things. Would you like to be one of them?

What do you call a sexually attracted pizza who spoons another pizza?

A Topping.

You need a good place to think? You can sit on my lap, and we’ll see the first thing that pops up!

Are you feeling down? Because I’d happily feel you up.

What’s the best thing about an 18-year-old girl in the shower?

Slicker hair back she looks 15.

Can we have sex, because if we don't, I can't like you, big, thick booty!

So let's have sex in bed, you sexy woman, or behind a tree, because shoving my dick in your pussy is a very nice feeling while sucking your ass.

What does the man cheeseburger say to the girl cheeseburger?

“You got nice buns!”

These two guys were at a bar flirting with these girls. The guy says, "Are you a parking ticket, 'cause you got fine written all over you?"

The girl turns and says, "How about you pay for them, and then I can pay you back with me getting all over you?"

I was always told I’m too small to ride, but every girl I’ve been with rated me a 9.5.

Is that a mirror in your pocket?

'Cause I can see myself in your pants.

If sex with three people is called a "threesome" and sex with two people is called a "twosome," then I know why people call you handsome!

I'm horny and gay.

I like your mom naked.

Why is my sister horny? It's because she loves my dick.

Are you a builder, because you give me an erection.

There was a girl called Millie, and she had sexy blond hair, and she wanted to chase me, but I told her she had to catch me first if she loves me.

Are you feeling down? Because I wanna feel you up.

Interviewer: What are your strengths?

Interviewee: I fall in love easily.

Interviewer: And your weaknesses?

Interviewee: Those beautiful green eyes of yours...

Is there a mirror in your pants? Because I see myself in them.

Are you a trampoline? Because I want to bounce on you.