Why is it that skinny men like fat women?
Because they need warmth in winter, and shade in summer.
That shirt's very becoming on you.
If I were on you, I’d be coming too.
If you have a girlfriend/crush that's shorter than you, go up to her and say, "You're short, lemme add some inches."
I love big hot sexy men.
If your eyes were the sea, I would drown in them.
What did the dirt say to the embers?
You look smoking hot.
Guy 2 whispering: Oh, I got tired of acting gay.
Guy 1: I heard you. Why are you acting gay?
Guy 2: To attract gays and then give them advice.
Guy 1: So what's your advice to me?
Guy 2: That I just know you're gay.
LOL xD
A young peasant coming from the field with his scythe on his shoulder notices an attractive young woman that was doing the laundry in a mountain stream, perched on some rocks near a waterfall.
The guy stops and leans against his scythe, fascinated by the young girl's beauty.
After minutes of watching her, she loses her balance, slips on a rock and falls all the way down, crushing her head on the white rocks.
Thoughtful, he puts his scythe back on his shoulder and walks away, saying to himself "Damn, another washing machine destroyed by limestone!"