Attitude jokes
Mad Pussy.
There were once these two twins. One twin, no matter what happened, was always pissed off, while the other one was always happy.
This baffled scientists, so they ran an experiment on the twins to figure out what was happening. They took the angry one and left him in a room with all of the latest technology and the most expensive toys and left him overnight. When they came back, he was still grumpy. When they asked him why, he said, "None of these are actually mine, and you left me in here all night, so I'm angry!"
His explanation was reasonable, so they ran another experiment on the other kid. This time, they left him overnight in a room that was literally just filled with horse shit. When they came back to check on him the next morning, he was still smiling. When they asked him why, he said, "With all of this horse crap, there has to be a pony in here somewhere!"
Why do women always have sex with the lights off?
Because they never like to see a man having a good time.
To anyone suffering from low self esteem:
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/UTymDoPOEnY
It's not a mistake, it's a ✨ masterpiece ✨.
Principal: “Why did you have to skip class? Because of that detention!”
Kid: “Whatever!”
Principal: “Why did you have to swear? Because of that one demerit!”
Kid: “Doesn't matter!”
Principal: “Why did you yell at a teacher and throw a chair at them? Because of that you're suspended!”
Kid: “Oh well!”
Principal: “Why did you have to push a kid down the stairs and kill them? Because of that you're expelled!”
Kid: “I'm trying not to kill myself!”
@everyone.. what's so funny is that JIT thinks he's so "cool" and that everyone is "amazed" about him hating on people who is wayyy above him on the roster.
The pathetic part is that he hates on everyone else's family and relationships when 100% of us have a WAYY better one than he will ever deserve. He was born pathetic, and will die pathetic. So JIT, please tell me what it's like to be such a coward?
James Bond: Vodka martini.
Bartender: Shaken, not stirred.
James Bond: Do I look like I give a damn?
Why are gay men so rude? Because they're fucking assholes.
How many redheads does it take to change a lightbulb?
One! She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
People who don't have common sense are just stupid people with ugly hearts. STOP HATING PEOPLE YOU NEVER KNOW! Also write "then exit the f word site," and I think we know that won't happen!!!
I L.O.V.E GWEN!!!!!!
Have you ever tried anal bleaching?
It really helps assholes lighten up.
You lot are sick sons of bitches!
What did the emo say before he crossed the road?
"Fuck my life."
Why is the sun so mean? Because it keeps ROASTING everyone!
How am I an ableist? My ex-girlfriend was in a wheelchair, and we lived in the same old building with a broken elevator. I ended the relationship by moving to the 8th floor.
Bully: You are a piece of shit.
Person: No, I'm not a piece, and I'm not brown... so no, honey.
Fuck people who are bigger than me physically, emotionally, mentally, economically, and socially.
I love not much.
My bro said food was cool. So I threw a piece of cool chicken at him. For some reason, he hit me, OOF.