Astronomy jokes
Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut?
He just needed a little space.
I know you don't like me, and that implies you need better taste.
I'm not an astronomer, but I'm pretty sure the Earth revolves around the sun... not you.
I'd give you a nasty look, but it seems like you've already got one.
Your birth certificate should be rewritten as a letter of apology.
You haven't changed since the last time I saw you. You really should.
Yo mama so fat you can see her from 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 galaxies away!
What's a homo's favorite planet?
Uranus.
How do you organize a space party? You "planet" with some "cheddar" and "brie"-pare for launch!
Yo mama so fat, she classified as a whole solar system.
What is a pedophile's favorite planet?
Uranus.
I just overheard this but:
How do you make a party in space?
You planet.
Does that neverending forehead of yours go all the way to Mars, holy fucking shit?
What did Jupiter say to Uranus? Hey, I can see your Uranus from here!
You call your dad the sun because he is 90 million miles away.
Yo mama so fat, when she sits down she dislocates Earth out of its orbit.
Your mom is so fat that the photographer had to go to the moon just to click the photo of her belly button.
Why did the cow go to outer space?
To see the moooon!
Q: What do you call a black prostitute in space?
A: The Blackhole.
Why did Uranus say gross? Because he saw Uranus.
What is Saturn's favorite movie?
Lord of the Rings.
Use the roast I put of flat earth.
So big that when you step, you break the whole galaxy.
You're so fat when you step, you break the galaxy.