Ares jokes

Bully says, "You are DISGUSTING!!!!!!"

The girl says, "Just like your face."

"I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered!"

If you can’t touch your brain or see your brain, you don’t have a brain?

Yo mama's armpits are so hairy, it looks like she's got Buckwheat in a headlock.

Why are the Twin Towers mad?

They are like pepperoni and cheese as a plane.

“Who are the fastest readers in the world?”

“The 9/11 pilots, they did 30 stories in 7 seconds.”

I bully orphans. What are they gonna do? Cry to their parents?

Why are orphans so naughty at school? It's not like the teacher is gonna call their parents.

Friend: How's it going?

Me: Good, things are good!

Parent: How are you?

Me: Oh, I'm fine!

Twitter: Compose new tweet?

Me: Hellooooo, I would like to tell you about my anxiety & my current greatest fears & let's talk about the impending apocalypse while we're at it.

Dark jokes are just like food.

Not everyone gets it.

Not even the FBI knows where an orphan's parents are.

If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.

What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

Two emos are dating, and the most romantic thing they have ever done is slit each other's wrists.

Why do an emo's parents not let them cook, because they are afraid they will cut themselves?

When someone says: "You're a mistake."

Say: "The only mistake I see is right in front of me."

If you're ever bored, just punch an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?

These are as weak as the towers.

Do you know why dead baby jokes are always funny?

They never get old.

Mommy, mommy! Are we drug dealers?

Shut up and cut the coke.

My sister told me she liked Medusa.

I said, "Huh?"

My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.