Arent jokes
In 1941, Hans, a young German boy, was listening to the radio.
Over the radio, Hitler announced that Germany was now going to war with the United States.
"Father, where is the United States?" Hans asked.
His father pointed at a map of North America.
"Aren’t we currently at war with Russia? Where might that be?" he questioned his father.
The man pointed towards the Soviet Union.
"And I’m told we’re also at war with the British Empire. Where is that?"
The father pointed out all of the territories owned by the British.
"Where is Germany again, Father?"
He pointed to their home country in Central Europe.
Hans pondered this information for a second. "One last question, Father."
"Yes?"
"Has Hitler seen this map?"
Man 1: I-I ran my mom over to get a stupid book.
Man 2: Aww, books aren't that bad. I'm sure she thinks you're a great son considering she can't drive anymore.
Man 1: She was in the road, and I was rushing to get the last copy of this book. She can't drive or do anything anymore.
Why aren't there any closets in southern churches? Closets have coat hangers.
Communism jokes aren't funny unless everyone gets it.
Two sticks of butter walk into a butter bar. One says to the other, "Aren't you going to introduce me to your friends?" He replies, "Sure, dis my butter from another utter."
Why aren’t koalas actual bears?
They don’t meet all the koalifications!
Two people are in a restaurant. Person #1 doesn’t order anything, and Person #2 orders a chili.
Person #1: “Aren’t you gonna eat your bowl of chili?”
Person #2: “No, you can have it.”
Person #1: “Ok, thanks...”
Person 1 starts eating his food only to find half of a dead rat! He vomits all of the food back into the bowl.
Person #2: “That’s about as far as I got too!”
Corpses aren’t funny—they’re dead serious.
Everyone becomes happy when they complete the last stage of the game.
But the cancer patients aren't.
I saw this one quote: "The people who smile the most are covering the most pain." I think this is true, just not with everyone. As I am really depressed and act like myself with my friends, but with my parents and family, I force a smile so they don't worry more than they do.
I did a test for my therapy session to see what level of depression I had. It came back with severe, 22/24, but I asked her to tell my mum it came back as moderate, saying I would tell her that my depression got worse. She went along with it, but I haven't told my mum and I now make things sound like I aren't as messed up as I truly am to my therapist.
Hispanic and Latino people be like, "No more immigrants!" Like, dude, aren't you an immigrant?
Jokes about the poor aren't rich.
I wanted to fall off a cliff, sadly, there aren't any cliffs near my house.
Vagina jokes aren’t funny, period.
Q. Why aren't midget jokes funny?
A. They always seem to punch down.
What do you call a zombie?
Nothing because zombies aren’t real, and if they were, you would be dead.
True fact: School shooters aren’t dangerous to you if you're the school shooter.
Suicidal thoughts aren’t nice, but nor is life. So why not get them both done and over with?
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
It’s not. Numbers aren’t sentient and are therefore incapable of feeling fear.
My name is Gwen, and I say rape jokes aren't funny. It's not funny for people to have sex with you without you agreeing. Also, they're getting old and NOT FUNNY! If anyone has something to say, please do. Comment if you agree or not. It's okay; I want to hear what you say. Just tell me if they are not funny.
We will have a contest to see how many people comment on saying they're good and funny, or people saying they're bad and terrible jokes and should not be made. May the best votes and comments win.