ANS jokes
Why does an orphan hate the ending of Finding Nemo?
Nemo goes back to his father.
What movie does an orphan hate?
"Spider-Man: Far From Home."
What do a male pornstar and an emo have in common?
They are both hung.
I tried to get into an emo bar, but I didn't make the cut.
I’d say Leo is as sharp as a marble, but that would be an insult to marbles.
Somewhere out there, a tree is tirelessly producing oxygen for BLESSEDBRIAN. I think he owes it an apology.
Why did the rapper carry an UMBRELLA?
Because he heard there was a 50% chance of "Lil Wayne."
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
A money manager who counts bars.
I would call Slade dense, but that would be an insult to rocks.
Why did the rapper become an astronaut?
To drop some BARS in SPACE!
Why did the rapper become an electrician?
Because he wanted to SHOCK the audience with his RHYMES.
Person 1: “How many ph vids have you watched today?”
Person 2: “Seven.”
Person 1: “What the fuck, dude.”
Person 2: “I know, right? I’ve gotten seven ads for Pizza Hut in the past hour.”
(Based on an encounter I had recently)
Do not be racist; be like Mario. He's an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
In case of ill rhymes!
What do you call a white woman working at an all black company?
Crack/her
What do you call a person who keeps making jokes about rappers?
An annoying prick whose black dad left him as a kid.
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
For when he made it RAIN in the club.
Q. What do ghosts do when they get hurt?
A. They call an AmBOOlance.
If Mexico is an unredeemable shithole, then how come the Republicans' favorite senator, Ted Cruz, ran to Mexico as fast as he could after a little bit of snow in his home?
I taped a picture of Bill Cosby to my gun. Now it’s an assault rifle.