Animal jokes
Why do cheetahs always get 100 on a test?
They’re cheetahs!
Why do duckies wipe after they poop?
Their butt quack.
What’s the name of this brand? *picture of puma logo*
Them: Puma
“Puma balls in yo mouth.”
Hi, my name is Moo, what is your name? Moo.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Anything you want; it won't chase you.
OFF
A mouse said, "Who should put the bell on the cat?" Then all mice said, "The old one."
What do you call gulls in the sea? Seagulls!
Llama: Hey sheep, let's play cards.
Sheep: Llama, fuck off!!
Llama: What's your damn problem?
Sheep: Nothing, I'm just having a Baahd day, okay dick head?
The fucking cat!
What happened when 800 hares got loose in the center of town?
The cops had to comb through the area.
Q: Why do birds need feathers?
A: To cover up their butt quack!
Q: Why do birds need feathers?
A: To cover their butt. Quack!
You smell like a monkey, and you might have to take a shower, pu.
Q: What did the grandma cat say to her grandson when she saw him slouching?
A: You need to pay more attention to my pawsture.
Bob the Golden Retriever and Lily the Husky were talking at Bob's house.
Lily: Bob, do you think I'm fat?
Bob: No, Lily, of course not! You're just a little husky!!!! Lol. Golden Retrievers are funny.
What did the dog say when he came home from a long shift at work? Today was ruff.
What do you get from pampered cows?
Spoiled milk.
A cow's favorite singer: Adam Bovine of Mooroon 5.
Chomp!
What do you call a 18+ animal jam?
Play Wild!