Animal jokes
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get on the person's face.
One dog said to the other dog, "Man, it is hard sleeping on the floor."
The other said, "Really? I like my bed."
What is the same with a duck and a bicycle? The handlebars--oh, except for the duck.
Head look like a mf gorilla pop.
Chomp!
Memes
Bro my cat just got rejected from art class
Q: Why did the duck cross the road?
A: To get to the other side.
Bob the Golden Retriever and Lily the Husky were talking at Bob's house.
Lily: Bob, do you think I'm fat?
Bob: No, Lily, of course not! You're just a little husky!!!! Lol. Golden Retrievers are funny.
What did the chicken say to the turkey?
Nothing, he chickened out!
A cow's favorite singer: Adam Bovine of Mooroon 5.
What do you call a 18+ animal jam?
Play Wild!
What do you call a cow with three legs?
Tri-tip!
Why did the chicken go to the mall?
To get new feathers!
What did the bus say to the mail?
Dog.
What did the dog say when he came home from a long shift at work? Today was ruff.
What do you get from pampered cows?
Spoiled milk.
What do you call a cow on steroids? A bull-y.
I had to take my pet octopus to the vet yesterday.
Oh, donāt worry, heās okay now.
But the vet charged me six quid.
Q: What did the grandma cat say to her grandson when she saw him slouching?
A: You need to pay more attention to my pawsture.
My friend Nickiya wanted to know what animal she'd be. I said that she would be a "Ni-cat-a."
There were three cats. The first cat said, "Meow." The second cat said, "Meow." The third cat said, "Meow meow." Then the first cat said, "Don't change the subject!"