Animal jokes
Why did the chicken cross the road?
'Cause it was stapled to the chicken.
What do you call a cow with all of his legs? High steaks.
Q: Why do birds need feathers?
A: To cover up their butt quack!
Q: Why do birds need feathers?
A: To cover their butt. Quack!
The fucking cat!
Memes
You smell like a monkey, and you might have to take a shower, pu.
What what's the cloud private place to go? Among us, cows.
What happened when 800 hares got loose in the center of town?
The cops had to comb through the area.
Did you know that dogs started the street craps game?
Zozo the hobo has two frogs and a bunny cage from pet expo. Why? Because he wanted a pet, you idiot!
Why did the alligator see a crocodile?
Because it ate too many humans, and he was sick.
What did the mama cow say to the baby cow?
Mooooooo my secret is that it's pasture bedtime, but not pasture bedtime!
What did the bus say to the mail?
Dog.
Times have been so tough lately, I have had to jerk off the dog just to feed the cat.
What is a fish's favorite fruit/vegetable?
An avacodo.
Knock, knock.
Who is there?
Bear.
Bear who?
Bear bum!
Bob the Golden Retriever and Lily the Husky were talking at Bob's house.
Lily: Bob, do you think I'm fat?
Bob: No, Lily, of course not! You're just a little husky!!!! Lol. Golden Retrievers are funny.
What do frogs wear for shoes? Open toad.
What does your mom say to you? "Love you, moody."
Chomp!
There were three cats. The first cat said, "Meow." The second cat said, "Meow." The third cat said, "Meow meow." Then the first cat said, "Don't change the subject!"